Jen made me laugh again with this one. I NEED this sign in my kitchen.
In fact, I'm going to ask for one for Christmas. Or maybe I'll just make one myself. Yeah, that's a good idea.
:o)
Oh, and by the way:
My newest creation in Canadiana, at Reflections.
It wasn't easy creating this moose - I had to find a happy moose, first of all, to get an idea of what I really wanted to portray. Have you ever hunted for happy moosen? They're not too easy to find.
Then I had to redesign him from scratch, once I had an idea of what I really wanted. The result? MooseLeaf!
MooseLeaf comes on all sorts of fun gear - go see for yourself. Looking for the perfect gift for your favorite Canadian? MooseLeaf is here to save the day! (Okay, he's not really big into saving the day, but he's a happy moose all the same, and he needs a home).
Last night Kev and I watched a movie called North Country. Either no one else on the planet has ever seen it, or no one else on the planet who has seen it, liked it enough to comment about it (among the people I read or talk to on a regular basis). I have a hard time believing either is true, so I'll just assume I missed the boat when it came out and people were talking about it.
In a nutshell, it's based on a true story of the first ever, class action sexual discrimination case involving a mining company in Minnesota.
I like movies like this - movies based on true, historical events. Even if they're only based on true, historical events, but take a bit of artistic liberty, like this movie apparently did (based on the reviews I read this morning).
In any event, several issues came up in this movie that really made me scratch my head. In the story, the central character leaves her wife-beating husband and moves back with her parents and her two kids. She takes a job at the local mine, where she (and the other women) are routinely harassed by the neanderthals working there. The rest of the story is obvious - she gets ticked off (rightfully so) and looks into suing the company for sexual harassment.
The thought occured to me while watching this movie, that there is such a horrible domino affect in our society, that has actually caused all of this sort of junk to happen in the first place. I believe it started with the insane "sexual revolution" in the 60's. Granted, I was still wearing diapers for most of the 60's that I was here for, and by the time they were over I was just entering kindergarten and learning how to be brave away from home - but I know enough about the era to know it was a time when society began to fall apart at the seems.
Not that wife-beating neanderthal husbands get a free pass in any of this, I do believe that the minute these manly-women began standing up and saying GIMME, burning their drawers on tv and demanding equality and all that - a lot of men got nervous. I was just a little girl when I saw a newscast of a group of women burning their bras, surrounded by police in riot gear - and it made me nervous. Even as a wee little kid, I knew something about all that wasn't right.
Somewhere in all that, the "bring home the bacon" men of the 50's (who were once admired by society) began to find themselves the butt of jokes and lost respect. When I started kindergarten in 1969, a kid with divorced parents was pretty much the exception to the rule in my small town. By the time I entered junior high in that same small town just 7 years later in 1976 it was no longer uncommon to meet a kid that lived with only one parent. Usually the mom, and usually the mom worked full time, or even two jobs to keep food on the table. I wonder how many of those moms hated those jobs and had all kinds of garbage to deal with on the job, and did it all because that was the only way to take care of their kids?
This movie caused me to think about a lot of these sorts of issues. Men who beat their wives and the wives who leave them (and the wives who stay). Women who changed the face of society with their selfish demands, and the spineless men who passed the laws. Men who walked out on their families and the women who took humiliating jobs to feed their kids. Kids who grew up without any kind of role model for a dad. Men who are chameleons - treating their wives and kids (and the wives and kids of their friends) in one way, but on the job where women are, treating them a completely different way.
I do admit I have monumental issues with women who think they're men. Now I'm not referring to equal pay for equal work - that I do not have an issue with. If Billy and Betty are both shovelling out the stalls at the local horsie farm, I see no reason whatsoever why Billy and Betty should not receive equal pay for doing the same job. Good, solid women (who know they are women) have been doing hard work like that for roughly 6,000 years - so this is not new. The issue I have is with the attitude that tells women that they can be whatever they want, go wherever they want, do whatever they want. Hello? BUELLER? No, we cannot.
Physically, we are not made for the kind of work men do, for the long haul. (The part time helping out with shovelling horse poop is not the same thing as doing it for 12 hours a day for 30, 40 or 50 years - men ARE made to work hard like that, women are not, no matter how strong she thinks she is).
Emotionally, we are not geared for it. I don't care how reasonable and/or analytical a woman thinks she is, she's still got all them female hormones running through her system and can and will cry and attempt to reason from emotion at any given moment, if pushed too far. She'll fake it, she'll put on a facade that she's fine, but she's lying through her teeth and she is not fine. We wound easily, because we're wired that way and there's not a thing we can do about it.
Spiritually, we suffer (and so do our children and our relationships with our husbands and others) when we're involved in long term "work" that takes us away from the home, and our families.
I completely understand the situations where women have had to go to work. My mom had to, I had to and millions of other women have had to. I'm not taking issue with those women, and I have much compassion for their situations. I'm taking issue with the women who choose to step outside of the role they were made for and march around saying GIMME. Shame on them, in spades.
Lest I seem unfair and only enrage the feminists, I also take issue with the creepy men in our society. The wife beaters, the neglectful dads, the slobs who leer at women and make revolting comments at someone's daughter. Yeah, those guys. The same guys that would see red in a heartbeat if another man spoke their own daughter the way they themselves speak to someone else's daughter.
Back in the day when I had to work, I had a few different jobs where I was the only female there, or in other cases, one of the very FEW females there. Part of the reason for that was because the kinds of jobs I applied for (and got) were the hard labor, hands-on jobs. Landscaping (I love it) and building maintanence (I know how to do it). With these two specific jobs, I was fortunate enough to be on crews with men who treated me like a sister, and not like... well, you know, not a sister. But those other guys existed in those places of employment. Oh yes, they existed and they made comments. The kinds of comments that women should never have to hear. The kinds of comments that make women want to cry, quit their jobs, or at least have someone come to their defense and stand up for them. The kind of comments that make women feel less than human, and hate the fact that it's either deal with that, or get in the welfare line to feed their kids. I was blessed - I did have men on my crew that stood up for me and didn't let the creepy men get away with those comments. I know that's not common, so I'm thankful for that, at least.
You and I both know the solution to all of this is a changed heart. With the heart change comes the worldview change, the personal views change and the lifestyle change. Right? Right??
I'm not so sure it's that black and white. It should be, but I notice more and more that "social norms" in our culture are finding their way into the worldviews of Christians. Maybe I haven't been paying attention close enough in the last few years, but it does seem that the lines are blurred (especially with younger believers) and the solid teaching about our roles (as men and women) just isn't there in the way it should be. Or if it is, it's laughed at as archaic, or some rosy Victorian era, romantic notion that isn't real, or isn't for our day. The same feminist attitude that changed our culture in North America 40 years ago, is now firmly rooted in the evangelical church. I don't know who opened the door and let it in, but whoever that was opened a floodgate of confusion. Shame on them for letting the domino affect tumble right into the front door of the local church. Some of those GIMME women are now pastoring churches in our cities and some of those men who lost their spines are sitting in the pews in those churches amening every word she says.
As you can see I have rambled on, touched on just enough issues to enrage pretty much everyone in every group I've mentioned, and will now likely lose all my readers as they heat up the tar and gather the feathers. I'm okay with that. I'm not okay with our culture or the way it's infected the mindset of my fellow evangelical brothers and sisters.
I guess it's just more reason to pray, right?
EH??
How funny is the blogosphere when you can logon one morning and find out another blogger has brand new socks for one of your kids?
How funny is the blogosphere when a very funny bi-annual blogger posts a link to TBN for Toddlers?
I didn't stay up too late last night, but I slept in way too late anyway - and therefore have no time for a real post this morning. But other people had stuff to say, so go read them instead.
Oh, and remember to keep Tim and Paul in your prayers as they travel to the Desiring God conference this morning. I'm looking forward to Tim's liveblogging this, it should be interesting.
I took this pic last Saturday - Tim's eating his chicken pot pie, and I think Paul is crying over Tim's table manners, but I'm not sure.
Visiting Jen's blog at joythruChrist, I saw this:
"My hope is that you will find something here that will be of use to you."
Then I saw this in the sidebar. It made me laugh. Yes Jen, I found something there that was of use to me. :o)
One of the things I noticed immediately after moving to Ontario, is the wildlife. No, I don't mean those people in downtown Toronto - I mean real wildlife.
I'm smalltown - I come from a place where there are woods everywhere, water everywhere, and I never realized just how smalltown I was, until I moved to a place that isn't smalltown. I knew I wasn't city, but didn't realize how anti-city I was!
In any event, one of the strangest things about living here, is that there is wildlife EVERYWHERE. No, I haven't yet seen a moose in my yard, but you just never know. Moving out to the country a few years ago has made it possible to see plenty of deer, fox, 'coons & all sorts of other critters on a regular basis. The skunk who let 'er rip in my garage, and the mice in the kitchen - they don't count.
It wasn't long after moving to Ontario that I became fascinated with birds, and began bird watching. Naturally I began looking online for ways to help me learn the bird IDs and one site I found is a GTA (Greater Toronto Area) bird sightings forum. I check the forum a little less often than I used to, but it's a great resource if you're in the general area and would like to learn more about birds.
A few months ago I came across a post there that I'd meant to link to here, and just forgot all about it. So, without further delay:
See, birding can be fun! (unless you're a coyote, lol)
I had several topics to mull over this morning to choose from and write about, but life got in the way. That tends to happen a lot here. First though, I do want to thank those of you that might have said a prayer for me, my neck is quite a bit better today, and for that I am very grateful.
I have several offline projects going on that take up a bit of time, plus I have 3 online projects going on that are doing the same thing. Those all come after school, housework and errands, so life is pretty busy right now. No time for neck condition flare ups! :o)
In any case, I found 3 posts this morning that caught my eye that I wanted to draw your attention to:
1. Dan at TeamPyro zips us a zinger with his cold, unfeeling Christianity. If you're ex-charismatic, you'll think he wrote this from inside your head. Dan's good that way.
2. Dan does it again over yonder at his own blog with the question of horror as a genre being redeemable.
3. Ian ruminates by his lake about damaging our kids if we deprive them of the fun to be had on 10/31.
Since I commented at all three places, I guess I did blog today - just not here.
WOOPS...
I can't believe I forgot this one:
4. Campi takes on a boy named sue. Amid conflicting reports there is a lawsuit, isn't a lawsuit, the lawsuit was dropped, the court clerk has no record of it being dropped, he said she said blah blah blah... Brother Campi addresses the issues from a purely Biblical view. Solid stuff, and well worth your time to read & consider.
If anything can go wrong, it will - Murphy's Law
Murphy was apparently not a very optimistic chap, was he? Well, just about the time I noticed the weather forecast for today was supposed to be clear and sunny with a high of 65, I thought YES, perfect day to get some MUCH needed yardwork done. Friends who have visited over the spring and summer know that there is still a rather large pile of firewood sitting on the back lawn that has been there since... February? Sigh...
Then, within minutes of seeing the weather forecast & making a mental note to get busy outside after school, my neck started to seize up. It does this from time to time, and when it does, it's a doozie. You know when you wake up with a kink in your neck that feels like someone had your head in a vice grip all night, at the most inhuman angle? Well, there ya go. It lasts for about a week before there's much relief. Simple tasks like moving, sneezing, blinking and other things like that, prove to be pretty painful.
So Murhphy has moved in for the next week or so and I'd sure appreciate those who pray, if they would remember me over the next few days. I don't do pain well.
And Murphy is a Pelagian. And his pants are too short, and he wears them with white socks and black shoes. He's a horrible man and should be avoided at all costs.
In an effort to watch what I eat a little better, I'm trying REALLY hard to avoid potato chips. Those who know me, know how much I love chips, and know this isn't easy for me.
Romans 12:18 If it be possible, as much as lieth in you, live peaceably with all men.
Sometimes (in my experience anyway), the only way to follow this verse is to completely avoid certain people. Having no contact with them in any way, allows you (and them) to live peaceably - since having contact with them might have already proven to you that they are not about peaceable living, but conflict and the like. At the very least, your lack of contact with them allows you to persue peaceable living.
Folks who use chat rooms know how this works in that setting. If you're a room moderator you can block users like this from entering your room, or channel. If you're a chatter, you can use the ignore feature or block feature to prevent certain folks from contacting you. These are very useful tools and allow you to enjoy your time in chat without being drawn into conflicts with those that are into that sort of thing.
Bloggers also know how this works. Our commenting tools give us the option of moderating comments, blocking certain users, etc. Many blogs have a set of commenting rules posted that include this kind of "rules of engagement" understanding:
(coming in at #9 on his policy) "Any current posts, past posts, and/or all future posts in any article(s) will be deleted at my sole discretion that are not honoring to the above" - Campi
#2 "keep within the parameters of Christian civility. We'll automatically delete comments with profane or unwholesome words, including abbreviated or otherwise disguised ones" and #5 "Break these rules three times and the moderators will automatically delete any further comments you post." -TeamPyro
Those are just two, off the top of my head. I've browsed many blogs that have very similar commenting guidelines. At ENo, I have this one:
"If you choose to send email, please know it may be considered for publication on this site. This is an attempt to help you maintain Christ-like conduct in your private emails." I have to say, it's been very effective in reducing the amount of ungodly emails, to almost none. Sometimes we just have to remind folks (ourselves included) that Christ-like conduct is expected, and nothing less will be tolerated.
Still other blogs don't even allow comments (like James White and Albert Mohler) for various reasons (and that alone annoys some people who seem to think they have a right to post their opinions on other people's blogs - I find that attitude quite bizarre, but I digress.)
What I always found frustrating about moderating a chat, was the conduct of a professing believer when they were expelled from the chat room (booted, kicked, banned, whatever). Many will change nicknames or even change computers, and come right back in with a different account. For some reason, they didn't "get" that you didn't kick their computer or their nickname out of the room, you kicked them out of the room. This means you didn't want them there. Hello? In some cases, it is the only way you can maintain civility and a peaceful atmosphere in a chat room (or on a blog, or forum) for the rest of the users/readers and yourself. In other cases it's the only way you can refrain yourself, from reacting in a less than Godly manner, toward them. Let's just be honest here kids, some people are just flat out annoying and like to stir the pot, and the temptation to blast off on them, is very real. This is what they want, and this is why they comment the way they do. This is why some bloggers call it "feeding the trolls" and strictly disallow it on their blogs. Blasting off is also not advisable - so the next best thing is to remove them (or yourself) from the situation. In the context of an online chat, blog or forum - when it's yours - that option comes in the form of banning the user from contacting you or using your comments/chat/forum.
It is unfortunate that it has to be this way, but it's reality. Some people like this kind of exchange with pot-stirrers (I think these are folks who watch Jerry Springer & the like). Others have this idea that "dialog" is more important than anything else and as long as you have that, there's something beneficial going on.
In the Hebrew language there's a word for this: HORSEFEATHERS. In the Greek, it's: MALARKY. Dialog is all well and good as long as there IS something beneficial going on. When the point is just to be an annoyance and push an agenda, it's a waste of everyone's time.
I wrote all of that this morning, and after re-reading it before posting it this evening it occured to me that it's most unfortunate that this has to be in the first place, and even be explained in the second place. However, this is the way it is, and I hope this helps someone understand why things have to work the way they do.
If you routinely have dreams where you are attacked by a wild animal, I wonder what that means?
The latest was a white tiger, escaped from a local wildlife reserve. I'll spare you the details, but I just wonder if there is really anything to these weird dream interpretations? Anyone know?
The bell was just about to ring when my teacher called me aside. A call had come from home and I was go go straight home after school, instead of going to grandma's house. My brother and I always went to grandma's after school, then walked home at 4pm. Mom worked the whole time we were growing up, and all through grade school Gary and I spent afternoons at grandma & grandpa's house. But not today...
Mom was bringing our sister and the new baby home from the hospital! I flew home faster than any kid on the planet has ever moved. I was an AUNT, and that baby was coming home today. I couldn't wait to see her, she was the cutest, tiniest, absolute coolest little person in the whole world, and she was MY niece.
I was so proud of myself for being an aunt, lol. Nothing could have happened that day that would have taken that feeling away. (And nothing ever has, come to think of it).
That was just a few days after September 24th, 1975. Happy Birthday to the world's cutest, tiniest, coolest person EVER to be born on that day.
{{{{ Lil L }}}}}
I'm home, I had a great time, I'm exhausted. That's what happens when you get up at 5, drive for 2 hours then have way more fun than you should have all in one day. I'm going to take a nap, and I'll fill you in on all the gory details later - but for now - pics are here.
And the best news of the day? The house was standing when we got home, and all the kids were well behaved. It couldn't have gone better than that.
Details coming soon...
-----------------------------
Okay, I'm rested now. I know you're all just bustin' to know about that cake (and it's true it was one of the highlights of the day), so you can skip past all the other stuff and go right to that part.
I have to admit, I've never been to a conference before, and to be completely honest - I was a little worried about meeting so many people that might actually read this blog. I'm not in any sense of the word, a "social butterfly" and blending into the backgrounds suits me just fine. The funny thing is though, once I was there, I wasn't nervous at all.
Okay now here's the part where we all start humming It's a Small World...
Right when we got there and registered (they made us put those name tags on that remind me of a hall pass in the 5th grade), a nice lady by the name of Heather came up and introduced herself to me. She said something along the lines of "Hi Carla, I know you from your blog, you're that idiot that Kim Shay refers to". Just kidding, she didn't say that, but she did know me from Kim's blog. We chatted with her and her husband for a few minutes, and that was nice.
Within the next few minutes we made our way into the sanctuary to find a seat, and a young man came up to me and introduced himself, and also told me he reads my blog (he didn't seem revolted, so I'm guessing this is a good thing). I noticed his name tag and wracked my brain to try and remember why I knew his name. I told Kev later that we should have written our blog names on our name tags under our real names. It turns out (thanks to Tim who jogged my memory) that this young man is the blogger behind Son of Man, Joshua. It was a pleasure to meet him, and his friends Lydia and Jas (hope I spelled that right.) Later, they were our co-pilots to the restaraunt - for which we were thankful since we had no idea where we were going.
It was really nice to see so many people we knew offline as well. Our former pastor David was there, and we had a nice (but short) chat with him, between morning sessions. We were never "official" members of David's church, but we did go there for a couple of years whenever Kev's schedule would permit - until we moved to the country four years ago. (Are we still humming It's a Small World? Okay good...) Just a few minutes later, we met Stephen and Daniel who Kev and I know from chat - who are both members of David's father's church.
Then we ran into Ben, who is an elder at our new church! We had hoped him and pastor Ken would be there, but pastor Ken wasn't able to come.
I guess I should tell you about the sessions? Well, I tried to take notes but it was too hard. James spoke so quickly, and was so engaging (don't shoot me for using that word, I couldn't think of a better one) that I didn't have much time to concentrate on notes. His topic was contemporary hermenuetics, and I have never in my life seen 2 hours fly past so quickly. It was hard to believe it was over so fast. I don't know how soon they'll have the mp3s or cds available, but when they do, the link to get them is right here. We weren't able to attend the Friday evening sessions but have been told they were exceptional - so we're looking forward to that on mp3 or cd.
Just before the first session, we met Greg from #pros. Thankfully, he's one of those people that looks just like his picture, so I recognized him right away, and he came and sat with us during the sessions. It was fun to visit with him, and Kev and him got quite a chuckle out of something.
Greg decided he was going to take a pic of Doc, with his cell phone. So during a very quiet moment, there was a loud QUACK to my right, followed by muffled giggles. Those muffled giggles were Kev and Greg, laughing at the sound his cell phone made when he took a picture. I pretended not to know either of them. Boys...
Before we knew it, it was time to leave for lunch. Joshua and his friends rode with us and we all headed to the Swiss Chalet down the road.
Already there when we arrived, were Jim and Annette. I must admit, it was odd to walk in and hear "hi Carla" in a place I've never even been before. :o) We were a little early but the nice lady seated us in just few minutes anyway.
Before long, Tim, Paul and Darrin arrived, and for the next hour the conversations were all over the place - everything from caffeine free Mountain Dew, to Canadian hangun laws, Ergun Caner and everything inbetween. I don't remember how, but Frank came up, along with Phil and Darlene, Jeff Williams (the astronaut), exploding watermelons, uber-blogging, gizmos, gadgets, dialup (aka "the Tawaiinese internet connection Dilup") and all sorts of other other things.
I was a little disappointed I wasn't able to talk more with Pastor Paul (who was kind enough to get a location for our lunch) and Darrin, but they were wayyyyy at the end of the table and the time went by too quickly. So quickly in fact, the first time anyone checked their watched to see how much time we had before the afternoon sessions began, we had exactly 9 minutes to get folks back to the church. You never saw a group of blogger/chatter/tech-geeks scatter so quickly, lol. Kev and I didn't even get a chance to say thanks or goodbye to Doc, as he was whisked away back to the church to get there on time.
I can honestly say after my first Christian conference (even though we only made it to a partial day's sessions), I was pleasantly surprised at how "at home" I felt around people I'd never met before. Sure some of us know each other from the internet - but meeting for the first time was a lot like meeting family you haven't seen in too long. Saying goodbye and leaving, was even a little bittersweet. The day was over too quickly.
We sang to the Lord together, we prayed together, did a lot of talking, and just as much laughing. It was a really great day, and I'm thankful the Lord provided us the opportunity to spend it with His people.
Oh yes... the cake! I mentioned to Doc that I blogged about it last night, so we checked the dessert menu and there it was. I put in my order, and so did he. I don't know if he finished his, but I wasn't able to finish mine. It was soooo good. I ate half & grabbed the other half in a take home container - which will be consumed in about 30 minutes - just as soon as the kids are off to bed. :o) Then I'll be doing some extra biking this week to work it all off. I think I gained 4 pounds just eating the first half.
But oh, it was so worth it.
I'm going to a Sola Scriptura Ministries conference in the morning, followed by a lunch with local area bloggers at the Swiss Chalet not far from the church.
I've never been to a Swiss Chalet. For that matter, I think the last time I was at a dine-in location was probably 2 years ago. Yeah, we don't get out much.
The real dilema came when I went looking for the phone number of the restaraunt to leave with our babysitter. I located the web page, and that's where things fell apart. They have a dessert menu online. They should not do such things to people like me.
So here's the real issue now...
Do I need to order this for dessert tomorrow? (Be sure to mouse-over the pic to really get a full idea of my dilema)
I'll check in the morning before we leave, for your wise counsel.
That Tim Challies - I'm tellin' ya... he hasn't heard the end of me! He closed comments on a thread I wanted to sound off on, and that violates my rights in some weird way so I think the only thing left to do, is sue him. Yes sirree bob, I'll ask the courts to force him to design the coolest blog for me you've ever seen, and in addition to my pain and suffering for being silenced, I'll seek additional action in the form of live blogging our family's next badminton game with the Kim and Neil Shay. That'll learn him!
Oh wait - that wouldn't be right, would it? Not to make fun of the seriousness of the lawsuit Ligonier Ministries and Tim Dick have filed against blogger Frank Vance - because it is quite serious - I'm just ribbing Tim because he closed the comments before I had a chance to at least make one more attempt at being an encouragement to those involved, and those commenting (and taking sides without appearing to have actually read what's transpired?).
This was the comment I tried to leave before Tim so ruthlessly stripped me of my ability to sound off:
"This whole thing is a mess - and an ugly one at that. I wish it didn't come about the way it has, but it has and for that I'm saddened. People have been slandered, and there are conclusions being jumped to without the measure of all the facts (on BOTH sides of this). It's just wrong and I think we all know that. I see "fault" in several areas here, but I also hold out hope that the right and Biblical thing will be done by all parties involved who profess to love the Lord. Because that's what devoted believers do, amen? Folks, pray for the parties involved. Pray that the folks at Ligonier will do the right thing, that Frank Vance will do the right thing, and that God will be glorified, despite what's already been said and done, on the part of both parties."
That was early this morning. I've since had some time to really think this through some more. The one thing I've noticed that seems to be really obvious (to me anyway) is that almost none of the parties directly involved are without fault in some way - and yet - folks are taking up sides like crazy, and either slamming Ligonier with some really ugly accusations, or slamming Frank Vance with equally ugly accusations.
Goodness folks - consider what this looks like!? It looks like exactly what it is, a public display that has no redeeming value towards a solid witness for Christ, at all. None, nada, zippo, zilch.
Whoever said "words are like bullets from a gun, and once fired cannot be taken back" was a genius, no question. We'd all do really well to remember that as we enjoy the freedom to blog away to our little hearts content.
While I do believe that it's perfectly acceptable to make public statements regarding a public ministry (or any other well known person), I think we have to be very careful in the way we make those statements. There are a million and one ways to say something, but most of those ways are wrong. Doing it the right way takes restraint, thoughtfulness, and hopefully a lot of prayer, beforehand.
In any event, I have decided not to sue Tim, especially since I'll see him tomorrow at the Sola Scriptura conference (and hopefully the lunch meeting), and that might prove to be awkward. "Hi Tim, good to see you brother, by the way I'm suing you, enjoy your grilled cheese!". Naw... not a good idea.
About a million years ago (or several months, I can't recall which) I promised one of my readers "GrammaMack" that I'd post my fried chicken recipe, and I forgot to do it. She was gracious enough to not remind me (until today) that I'm an airhead and completely forgot about it.
Kev and the kids say "this is the best fried chicken EVER!" - your results and opinions may vary (I don't eat it, so I have no idea what it tastes like). I also don't usually measure anything unless it's someone else's recipe, so I'm going to wing it on the measurments, and give it my best:
12-16 pieces boneless, skinless thighs
3 cups flour
1 tablespoon poultry seasoning
1 tablespoon lemon-pepper
1 tablespoon onion powder
1 teaspoon garlic powder
2 eggs, beaten
Rinse the chicken in cold water. Mix the flour and seasonings and set aside. Beat the eggs in a small bowl and dip each piece of chicken in the egg, one at a time. Dip egg-coated chicken in the flour mixture and be sure to completely coat each side. When all the chicken is coated, place a few pieces at a time (mine holds 4) in the deep fryer on "fried chicken" setting, or at around 350 farenheit. Fry until golden brown, or about 7-8 minutes. Remove and place on paper towel or absorbent cloth.
And there ya go. Jessica eats hers dipped in Caesaer salad dressing, or with lettuce, cheese and mayo on a sandwich (she thinks she's at Burger King). Kev and the kids just eat it until there's none left. I don't eat it, but they always get that "little kid at Christmas" look on their faces when I tell them I'm making it, so it must be pretty decent.
If you make it, let me know how it worked for you. :o)
Did you ever wish (maybe when you were an imaginative little kid?) you could wake up one day and be someone else?
I used to have this silly daydream when I was a kid. I had it all planned out too - I'd wake up one morning and I'd be a little Hawaiian girl with flowing, shiney black hair all down my back, pearly white teeth, great sense of humor and everyone would like me. I have no idea why I wanted to be a Hawaiian girl, but that was the plan. Kids have goofy imaginations.
I'm not sure what it was about me when I was a kid that I didn't like, but obviously there was something that being a funny, pretty Hawaiian girl seemed more appealing than who I was.
In a spiritual sense, the unsaved will have thoughts similar to this - but it manifests in a bit of a different way. They'll attempt to achieve this "newness of self" with all sorts of diets, self-help programs, religious or "spiritual" paths, radical cosmetic surgeries, or playing the lottery in hopes of cashing in on the jackpot. The promise of all that cash sure gives someone lots of daydream ammunition to feed their ideas about who and what they could be, if they had all that money. These are people that are simply unsatisfied with who or what they are, and look for exterior ways to become someone or something new, better or different.
Although, it's only the inner man, that really matters. Who you are on the inside, makes the eternal difference:
• Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new. (2Cor.5:17)
• Therefore we are buried with him by baptism into death: that like as Christ was raised up from the dead by the glory of the Father, even so we also should walk in newness of life.For if we have been planted together in the likeness of his death, we shall be also in the likeness of his resurrection. (Romans 6:4,5)
• I am crucified with Christ: nevertheless I live; yet not I, but Christ liveth in me: and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by the faith of the Son of God, who loved me, and gave himself for me. (Galatians 2:20)
• A new heart also will I give you, and a new spirit will I put within you: and I will take away the stony heart out of your flesh, and I will give you an heart of flesh. (Ez. 36:26)
Someone once told me that one of the most interesting things a Christian will face, is to be around people who knew you before you became a Christian. He explained that those people knew the old you, and will often expect you to be the old you. I thought about this for only a few seconds before I realized just how accurate that is.
When God's grace enters your life in the form of conversion to Christ, you do indeed become a brand new person, on the inside. Your worldview changes, your likes, dislikes, wants, desires, hopes, dreams - they all change. Some drastically, others maybe only slightly, or maybe over time - but they do change. Your attitudes, demeanor, they way you speak to people, the way you listen - it all changes. It changes because He is changing you, shaping you, more and more with each passing day, being "transformed by the renewing of our minds" (Romans 12:2).
If you are in Christ, you don't ever have to daydream about becoming someone new, you are someone new. And the great thing is, you will become less and less like the old you, and more and more like Him, with each passing day. We have this promise in Philippians 1:6:
Being confident of this very thing, that he which hath begun a good work in you will perform it until the day of Jesus Christ
What amazing grace this truly is.
She labored diligently to make her way back to her den, with her provisions for the young. The closer she got, the more the young sensed she was near, and the excitement among them reached a fevered pitch.
As they spotted her they hurried to meet her as she approached the den. They didn't acknowledge her, as they went immediately to the provisions she had with her and then began their chatter amongst themselves.
A wild animal feeding her babies with the kill of the day, perhaps?
Nope, this is what happens when I come home with a van full of groceries. It's pretty funny too - I have no idea how they know I'm coming, since the corn in the field is so high you can't even see the road from the house. Somehow though, they know. And by the time I pull into the driveway they're all there, waiting to open the back of the van and dig in to the bags. Kids are funny.
Today is the official last day of summer, tomorrow the first official day of fall. It was a great summer full of really good weather, good times, good fun, lots of finished projects, barbeques, visits with friends, swimming, biking, badminton, stunning sunsets and sparkling starry skies.
As much as I always feel sad to say goodbye to summer, I sure look forward to fall. The crisp air, dazzling color changes in the trees, the smell of woodsmoke and watching the fall bird migration. For some reason that only God knows, fall has been the time of year when lots of highly emotional events have taken place in my life. Some were really wonderful, others extremely painful. No matter, fall is probably my favorite time of the year. For some reason it's always reminded me of that time in the evening when all the kids have gone to bed and it's a few hours yet before I turn in for the night. That might sound odd, but that's what it reminds me of.
So, welcome autumn. The leaves have already begun to fall in the yard, and the walnut tree is looking pretty skinny already. Soon, the 100 year old chestnut tree will begin shedding it's leaves, and the yard will be covered. Tomorrow we've got rain & t-storms in the forecast, after a beautiful sunny day today.
I think I need to celebrate tomorrow by making my friend Darlene's amazing ginger cookies. I was going to make them today but I completely forgot! A warm batch of ginger cookies on the first day of fall is a perfect tradition to begin, don't you think? You're all welcome to come over & share them with us - I'll make coffee (or hot cocoa or tea for you non-coffee folks).
:o)
So, my 3 year old knocked over my camera (it was on the tripod) and since the usb cord was plugged into it at the time, when it landed it landed on the area where the cord connects to the camera (they tell me this is a port, but whatever). The impact caused the reader (?) inside the camera to come loose, and now it doesn't work. The camera works and the picture card works, but the cord wont attach inside the port anymore because it's loose. So I can't download the pics off the camera to the pc.
I called the camera shop to see about getting it fixed and he sort of giggled when I told him the digital camera is roughly 4 years old. He explained that there have been roughly EIGHT generations of cameras manufactured since this one was, and in all liklihood the part to fix it no longer exists. That was comforting.
What he suggested instead, was buying a card reader. He said that they do the same thing my usb cable thingie is doing now (or was doing, before it went wonky), but they're better, faster, and cheap.
He said what I need is a card reader that supports XD picture cards, for my Fujifilm camera.
Here's where you come in:
I have no idea which one to buy, which brand is good, better, best - or any of that stuff. I know what one IS (the card reader), I just don't know where to go to buy it, or what a reasonable price is. The giggling camera shop guy said they have them in stock but he quoted a price that didn't sound so cheap to me. Besides, specialty shops always charge more than big stores that sell the exact same thing.
I did a search this morning before school and wound up at a flash drive cleaning usb port thingie site where my head blew up, because I had no idea where I was or what those things were. I think Jack Bauer uses them to catch terrorists, but I'm not sure.
So can anyone help me? Pretty please?
UPDATE BELOW
There have always been books like this. There have always been ways that books like this find their way into the hands of people without the maturity to know what to do with books like these.
I've been meaning to post about this for the last week or so, but I couldn't bring myself to come up with alternative descriptions for what this book is, why it exists and how much I loathe it. Every time I considered how I'd approach this subject, it felt like wallowing in filth.
When I first read it about it I thought "and yet another confirmation for me that homeschooling in Ontario is the right thing to do for this family". I will warn you, the following links are highly offensive, and you should know that ahead of time.
Enough said - here's a WND article on said book:
'How-to-be promiscuous' plan considered by schools' Black Book' also promotes 'gay' agenda, abortion and calls God 'fat black dyke'
Here's the Canada Free Press article where I first read about this:
Stop Government-funded Same Sex Indoctrination
---------------------------------
It was my intention to provide a "what you can do about it" piece but I was pressed for time this morning and planned to add it later today.
Interestingly enough, there have been some new developments in the last 48 hours it seems. From the Defend Marriage Coalition site:
"AS of September 18 it appears that St. Stephen’s House has taken off the Little Black Book pages. Also it appears that Industry Canada has done likewise. We are told they are not giving it out at the House either. It however does not solve the issue of mis-guided tax dollars spent on this project, who in Industry Canada approved of the project, how much money was actually spent in development, publishing, printing and circulating the Booklet. This is not the end of the story! "
This is the site I was going to link to for this reason:
What can you do? ( Click on the underlined words for more details. )
1. Call your Member of Parliament and MPP or MLA: AB BC MB NB NL NT NS NU ON PE QC SK YT
2. Become a member of Defend Marriage.
3. Donate to the "Stop Same-Sex Indoctrination" campaign
4. Download the petition, fill it out and submit it, or submit your petition online.
I probably shouldn't post when I am angry, but I just HAVE to get this out, or I might blow up.
For the regular listeners of the Dividing Line, you already know where I'm going. For those who are not regular listeners, I'll be as brief as possible on the background:
Several days ago James White received an obnoxious, insulting, derogatory email from a woman named Miki. You can read her email here. James responded on his blog and invited her to call in the DL and discuss her accusations. No one expected her to take him up on the offer, since the vast majority of people that like to fire off emails like that, don't have the guts to actually SAY those things.
Yesterday, James posted that Miki agreed to call the DL today, as long as he "not dominate the conversation with sophistry and anger". As soon as I read that at his blog, I thought "such nerve - she fires off a putrid, venom-filled email to a man she doesn't even know, and then has the audacity to place such conditions on her phone call?" In any event, she did call.
Oh, did she ever call. You can listen to this disaster here, and I strongly recommend you do, so you understand what made me (and others no doubt) so angry.
James has posted about this phone call here, and Miki and her pals are gloating about it here.
What James didn't say in his post, was how incredibly gracious and patient he was with this woman. You'll hear it when you listen to the show.
What made me so angry, was the fact that she slandered him, spoke condescendingly to him, wouldn't let him get a word in edgewise, couldn't back up ANYTHING she was accusing him with, with any kind of facts at all, then had the unbelievable audacity to actually call him a liar (she didn't use that word, but she sure did call him a liar all the same), when the subject came up of him getting critical emails from Roman Catholics.
Why does this make me so angry? Simple, I hate it when people lie about others. I hate it with a flaming passion. More than that however, as a woman, she was an embarassment! She gave an incredibly compelling example of why women should be EXTREMELY careful about what they say publicly, and how they say it.
I cannot believe that there aren't any rational, reasonable people over at the forums where she's carrying on about this, that will not admonish her for her public conduct and outright lies about James White. Disagree with James all you like, but I sure hope someone in her "camp" steps forward to rebuke this lady for such a display.
There are ways to express yourself when you disagree with someone, and if there ever was an example of how NOT to do it, "Miki" nailed it today.
My hat is off to James for keeping an even tone with this woman and giving her such freedom to say her piece - I know myself well enough to know I would NOT have been half as gracious toward such ugliness.
Whew... okay, I'm done. Now go listen to today's DL to hear for yourself how to never publicly disagree with someone, lest you make a complete buffoon out of yourself and embarass the very cause you're trying to further.
I know others have written about this, and I know others have written about this in a much more comprehensive and convincing manner than I am able to. If you know of a good article that covers this, I want to hear from you!
MCWM
Man (or me) centered worship music. Oh how I cannot stand it.
I think I first began to feel the conviction over this when I was still in the AoG church. Many of the worship songs I really liked, but after a while when I really began to think about the words I was speaking to God, in song, it occured to me just how it sounded like I was trying to convince God into realizing how good I was, or what I was doing for Him.
It was almost as if I was rattling off my resume to God, trying to impress Him with how I worship Him, how I adore Him, how I bow down to Him, and how I this and I that and I the other. I'm not an English major (or even an English minor) but I have to wonder if an English professor were to look at a contemporary worship song, if they'd come to the same conclusion that the actual subject of the song, is the person singing it, and not the person being sung about?
To me, that is the way it sounds, even if that isn't the way it was intended to sound. With so much emphasis on self in these songs, it's really hard for me to even sing along with them, in church. I can't even give you an example because I don't know the names of these songs, nor do I have any of them memorized to type out for you.
In the effort of attempting to give the writers of such songs the benefit of the doubt, I think what they were trying to achieve was an expression of praise, an expression of emotion for the grace and mercy that He shows us. Anyway I think that's what it's supposed to be about - but I still have a very hard time singing those kinds of songs.
When I worship the Lord in song, I don't want to tell Him what I think of me, I want to tell Him what I think of HIM.
So now I want to hear from YOU. Do you have issues with these songs? If yes, have you come to some sort of resolution with it? I'd really like to hear what others have to say - I struggle with understanding this one.
Last week while Frank was on vacation, he had this goofy idea that it would be beneficial for his sidekicks to take over and guest blog for him at ...and his ministers a flame of fire.
Well, I just wanted to take a minute and express my thanks for Frank allowing us to goof off at his blog & trusting us not to burn the place down or break any furniture. (Althought I think Nate did knock over few lamps... but you didn't hear that from me).
If you're a regular reader over at Frank's, you'll see that my fellow sidekicks did a great job. If you're not a regular reader, well... then you won't see it. And you missed Daniel's hilarious and exciting fish story. Yes, I said fish story - it was great, you NEED to go read it.
I also wanted to take a minute to congrat Daniel on becoming a new sidekick! You know, life doesn't get much better than when you achieve hero-support status. There's winning the lottery, finding the extra donut in the box, hearing your kids give an unprompted apology to a sibling - and then sidekick status. Way to go Daniel! :o) (No, you cannot wear my purple boots, so don't ask).
Now go read the fish story, you'll be glad you did.
I had so much to write about this weekend. I had some notes, had some drafts, had some plans about doing a particular study - then life happened and all that went out the window.
We were supposed to have left yesterday morning for one last hurrah at the beach with Kev's dad & wife, then Kev woke up sick yesterday morning. Nausea, sweats, dizzy... he suggested he might be pregnant. I replied with "better you than me!". I have a feeling he's not pregnant - justa hunch.
So yesterday the plans were scrapped and he lazed around the house most of the day trying to convince himself he wasn't sick. I figured, since I wasn't supposed to be here anyway, I might as well use the day to get some outside yard work done. So for three hours or so I clipped hedges, and raked, and weeded, and clipped some more, and pruned a blue spruce - then collapsed in uber-pain from over-doing it. I don't like the idea that I'm not a spring chicken anymore, there is just too much yard work to do (and I didn't even finish!).
Plans were rearranged to have Jordan's birthday here, after church, instead of at the beach. Kev stayed home nursing his imaginary pregnancy, and the kids and I went to church. I was reluctant to go because my tummy felt "off" all morning. I knew what was coming, I just hoped it would hold off until Jordan's birthday party was over.
Kev's dad & his wife Grace, and his sister Kim were all here when the kids and I got home from church. We had a nice lunch, courtesy of Grace & her delicious cooking, Jordan opened her gifts, there was cake (oh, the cake... you've never seen a caramel cake so unbelievably delicious!) and a good time was had by all. And the whole time, my tummy was "off". I knew what was coming...
After everyone left around 5, I sat down to upload pics of the day - only to discover my camera is broken. The little slot where you plug in the usb cord is loose and wiggly on the INSIDE of the camera - so the software doesn't even read that it's plugged in. Not good. I assume that was a kid-accident that I wasn't told about. I have no idea what it might cost to get that fixed, but I guess I'm going to find out. Until then, I can either take my picture disc to WalMart or just wait until I can upload them from a fixed camera.
Not long after this, the tummy episode I knew was coming all day, finally came. So the next 5 hours were a complete write off for anything except a lot of prayer and not much of anything else. I've had tests done and they say it's IBS. Honestly, I don't buy it. Then again, I'm not a doctor, and I don't even play one on tv, so what do I know? In any event, the pills didn't work this time (until the second dose at 10pm), so that was pretty miserable.
So, all my plans for the weekend were completely switched up, changed around, cancelled, post-poned and otherwise nuked. I did manage to finish 2 more Christmas designs sometime this weekend, and that wasn't planned either. I'm pretty pleased with the way they turned out too:
Other than that, nothing else got done, that I had planned to do.
Tomorrow is a new day, so we'll see how that shapes up. One of the things I've been planning on writing about is me-centered worship music. I know lots of folks have written on this before, but I'm planning on it all the same. I have issues, with me-centered worship music, and maybe writing about it and getting your feedback will be of some benefit to myself, and others? I hope so.
(I wasn't supposed to be here this weekend - we had plans for the beach - but Kev woke up sick this morning. He's feeling a little better tonight, thankfully.)
If there were ever one question that has eluded mankind since the dawn of time, that question would have to be "what happens after I die?"
The destiny of the unbeliever after death, is laid out clearly in Scripture. The unbeliever is destined to eternal condemnation and the wrath of God. Much has been written on this by far more astute minds than my own, and this subject is a hot one for disagreements & debates even among professing believers. I really don't want to focus on that, however.
Last Sunday my pastor recalled how a secular song he heard recently made him think of what it's like for a Christian, considering eternity. The words in the song he heard were "the best is yet to come". Isn't that the truth? The best is yet to come.
For the believer, our destiny is eternal life with Christ, after our physical bodies quit working. Freedom from pain, weariness, the stress of this life, disappointments, failures, illness, and all the other difficult things that happen in life that take a toll on our physical bodies. What waits for us the very second we take our last breath in this world, is beyond what anyone here can really describe - since none of us can fully comprehend everlasting glory with Christ. The promise is ours, all the same:
• Jesus said unto her, I am the resurrection, and the life: he that believeth in me, though he were dead, yet shall he live: And whosoever liveth and believeth in me shall never die. Believest thou this? (John 11:25,26)
• But whosoever drinketh of the water that I shall give him shall never thirst; but the water that I shall give him shall be in him a well of water springing up into everlasting life. (John 4:14)
• For the wages of sin is death; but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord. (Romans 6:23)
• My sheep hear my voice, and I know them, and they follow me: And I give unto them eternal life; and they shall never perish, neither shall any man pluck them out of my hand. (John 10:27,28)
• These things have I written unto you that believe on the name of the Son of God; that ye may know that ye have eternal life, and that ye may believe on the name of the Son of God. (1John 5:13)
It's important that we know what the Scripture says about the life to come, not only for our own peace of mind, but so that we might also share this incredible news with others. If you've never done a study on eternal life, or if it's been a long time since you have, I would encourage you in that direction. It will really bless your heart.
Unless you've been in a cave or on a desserted island for the last few months, you can't help but notice every store in town has Halloween goodies shoved right up at the entrance. Crates filled with bags of candy, racks full of costumes, and aisles filled with make-up, wigs, hats, and all sorts of other accessories.
I had to walk past all this junk today at the store, and it's already come up in conversation a few times, so I wanted to take a few minutes to write about a particular aspect of this. I hope you'll indulge me and consider what I'm saying.
For me, there have been various phases of halloween.
Phase 1A
Like most people in my generation, I grew up in what was considered a culturally Christian community. Pretty much everyone went to church on Sunday morning whether they wanted to or not. Going to church did not mean you were a Christian, although if asked, you'd say that you were (because you went to church).
Every year on Halloween you'd dress up in your favorite cartoon character and grab ye old pillow case from the linen closet and off you'd go. There were certain houses you weren't allowed to go to:
a.) the ones with the porch light off
b.) the ones with the dog out in the yard
There were also rules about the candy you got:
a.) no eating of any candy until you got home and mom checked it out
b.) no eating of any unwrapped candy - ever
c.) no eating of any popcorn balls unless mom knew the neighbor that they came from
You trick or treated until the inside of your plastic mask was stinky with your own breath, and/or the thin white elastic band finally gave way on one side and you had to hold your mask on. By the time these events would occur, you knew it was just a matter of time before your mom was going to say "okay kids, I think we've been out here long enough". The dreaded and doomed words of adult logic crashing down on the ears of greedy candy mongers scouring the streets for more and more.
Phase 1B
As you grew up, the cheap plastic masks were replaced with the cool latex ones, or your own handy work from cheap clothes & props from the second hand store. You hoped no one would notice that you were "too old!" to go trick or treating, and in some ways you really felt like you were, but didn't want to admit it to anyone, especially yourself. As the years ticked by you no longer trick or treated, but you still dressed up (like a complete fool) and either went to parties (with an abundance of fools) or held them in your own home. Gone were the pillow cases stuffed with miniture Hershey bars (which were a lot bigger when I was a kid!) and orange colored popcorn balls, those were now just a faded memory of childhood. Such items were now replaced with more adult-style treats and beverages, and the odd thing was, the more you imbibed in them, the more you acted like a 5 year old child. Go figure.
Millions of Americans and Canadians my age, are still in Phase 1B of North American Halloween. It is inarguably one of the most consumer driven "holidays" of the year, and has been this way for a very long time. You know this to be true and probably thought about it even briefly yourself, as you passed the huge boxes of JuJubes and Junior Mints at the grocery store, back in JULY.
For a lot of Christians though, Halloween takes on some new phases.
For us, there were at least 3 more:
Phase 2 - The Waffler Stage
After conversion, there was the pesky issue of Halloween to deal with. In 1994 (and for several years prior to that) our house was THE neighborhood Halloween house. I don't say that to boast, just to state facts. There is nothing to boast in, in this account, other than we were dolts.
We had spent many years fine tuning our Phase 1B'ness, and we'd figured out how to really deck the outside of the house to creep out the toughest of the tough. Sound affects, animated hanging things, and more. By 1993, we'd nearly perfected a lifesize dummy (complete with liquid latex face mask of a real person, and latex arms and legs for a very realistic affect). "Bob" as he became known, spent the year in the woodshed and every October first he'd be brought out, cleaned up, and put on display. Bob was animated with fishing line - and could stand, sit, turn, wave, and do just about anything you can do with a hand held marionette. Only Bob was lifesized and operated through the window, on large slats of wood attached to the line. Bob was creepy, but people were drawn to him like mad. Rather demented, actually.
In any case... new life in Christ came in the spring of 1994, so by the fall we had some issues to deal with. What to do about Bob? What to do about costumes, dressing up, and all that comes with that? We weren't really sure, so we did what we always did, (because tradition is comforting that way) and before the night was even half over, we felt heartsick, and weren't even having fun. We didn't even need to talk about it, we all knew what was happening. So, we decided on November 1st, that Bob had officially retired and would not be back the following year. We'd trade in our ghoulish spook-duds for happy/frilly/silly/funny costumes and everything would be okay. We were only kidding ourselves, and we knew it, but we played along for about 6 months.
Ben was getting really sick, and finally had to go to the hospital for care. One of the days he was lucid, we finally had a real conversation about Halloween. He said something to the affect of "you know we're just compromising, right?". I said yes, that I did. So I asked, "what do you think about just NOT participating at all this year?". I honestly didn't even think he'd be there for halloween that year, but he said "I think we should have made that decision a year ago". So it was settled, we wouldn't celebrate it that year.
Ben passed away 2 months before Halloween, and our decision to opt out, was replaced with me caving in to pressure to conform. I hated that I did it, but I did it all the same. The girls were glad to go out, but they knew it was the last time, ever.
Phase 3 - The Rabid Legalist Stage
The following year was filled with researching the origins and traditions associated with halloween. I read everything I could get my hands on, went to the library, borrowed books, watched tapes, and more. I even went so far as to begin interviewing Wiccans online, to get their perspective on Christians that celebrate halloween, and where some of our modern day traditions come from. That was a real eye opener, to be sure.
More than ever, I was convinced that not only was it wrong for me and my family to participate, it was wrong for any Christian to participate, and it was my job to tell them all about it. Yep, I fell into the trap, and I fell hard. For the next couple of years I was in the Rabid Legalist Stage, and it got ugly. Real ugly.
By this time Kev and I were married and he was my partner in Rabid Legalist Stage Crime. He was as bad (or worse?) as I was, and together we were just pathetic. We were those people that you might see charicatured as saying "our little ones will NEVER know what this trick or treating is all about!" in a real smug way that gives the impression that OUR kids are going to be the better for it, so pooh-pooh on you, you heathen. Yes, we even plastered the grocery stores with Chick tracts to warn the masses just how evil halloween really is.
Well, while our youngest four kids have never participated in any kind of halloween event, that has more to do with the fact that the Lord saw fit to knock us down a few pegs and cause us to see how ridiculous we were actually being about the whole thing. While our convictions to remain disassociated from the whole thing were genuine, the way we'd gone about it was all very grace-less and unkind, at times. Rabid Legalist Stage came to a crashing halt, about 5 years ago.
Phase 4 - Quietly Contented Stage
We learned the hard way that while we may be convicted of something, that doesn't mean that others have been, and trying to force our convictions on them will never work. It was embarassing, but it was a lesson we both needed to learn.
We both came to a place where IF asked, we would tell people why we do not participate in halloween. Pretty simple.
However, over the last few years we've both noticed something really strange.
As Rabidly Legalistic as we used to be against halloween, we've both encountered Christians that are almost as rabidly PRO halloween, and try to make us (or anyone else that has opted out) feel like we're depriving our kids or something if we don't join in. It's a most awkward kind of situation - and you can bet you're going to see plenty of examples of this in the weeks to come, on blogs, message forums, etc. I see more and more of it every year.
Brothers and sisters actually made fun of, mocked, and belittled, because they don't celebrate Halloween.
This ought not take place among the household of faith, but it sure does.
It seems to me, having been on both sides of this issue, that the truly Christian thing to do is follow your convictions, and respect those who differ from you, at this time (wherever you happen to be with this issue, yourself).
Of course dressing up is fun - who doesn't like to do that?
Of course candy is fun - we all like candy! Don't we?
The thing is, it's not about those things at all. If you're someone who has been convicted to opt out, then follow His lead and if others ask why, tell them with gentleness and grace. If you're someone who participates, then participate and don't take issue with those who don't - they've been led a different direction and that should be respected.
Just some nutritional food for thought, as the season of halloween candy is already upon us.
And with that, I will be back sometime Sunday night. Have a great weekend, and a blessed Lord's Day.
So, last night I'm reading this news item about a mother in Germany who was tossed in the klink for 10 days for homeschooling her 12 children, while dad whisks the kids away to Austria, out from under the German authorities...
And I'm thinking:
"would I still homeschool if I knew I might go to jail?"
I'd like to be able to say yes, but there's the whole issue of obeying the laws of the land, as long as they don't force you to sin. I don't know what the public schools are like in Germany where this family is living, but if sending their kids to the public schools would be forcing them to sin, then I can understand why they don't do it.
The part that really made me laugh, and ticked me off all at once, was this piece in the article:
"Stefan Sedlaczek of the Catholic website kreuz.net heard about her arrest on Saturday. He reports today that a female plain-clothes police officer rang at Katharina Plett’s house on Thursday around 11:00 am. When she opened the door other police officers, who had hidden themselves, forced their way in. Mrs Plett was allowed to change, but a police officer followed her into her bedroom in case “she would arm herself and shoot us all.” The woman was able to inform her husband by mobile phone before the police brought her to Bielefeld."
You know... it's a little known fact that us homeschool moms could hit the breaking point at any moment, arm ourselves and engage in a shootout with local authorities. When it happens, it usually happens in our pajamas too - so it's perfectly understandable that this officer would feel the need to follow this mother into her room while she changed. Can't have any of those pajama-clad Homeschool mom shootouts or anything. (Insert sound affect here of Napoleon Dynomite saying "idiot!")
I get so tired of stupidity. I mean come on, HOW common is it, that a homeschool mom has ever armed herself in Germany during an arrest for homeschooling? Do we have access to any kind of stats on this one? I'm going to guess no, and I'm going to guess that they don't even exist because it's likely never happened, and likely never WILL! Ugh.
So back to the question:
Would I still homeschool if I knew it meant a 10 day jail sentence (which would also likely be followed by Children's Aid poking around in our family's business, and all the joy and delights that come with that)?
How about you, dear reader who homeschools? Would you? Is your children's education worth the sacrifice? Is educating them in a Christ centered environment important enough to you that you'd take that chance?
Homeschoolers in Germany think so.
I've been meaning to let you know about a really great resource, but before I do that - I wanted to let you know about what I think is also a really great resource - my store! I've updated the WHAT'S NEW page and the current newsletter is also online, if you just want to see the uber-cool highlights. As of this week we now have almost 100 email subscribers to the bi-weekly newsletter, so at least someone else (besides me) thinks this is a great resource!
Okay, on to other stuff...
Not long ago I made a comment (either on the blog or in the comments themselves, I don't recall offhand) about learning sign language.
This is something that I've wanted to do for SO long, I can't even recall how long it's been. Some years ago I watched a lady in church sing and sign O Holy Night, and it was the most beautiful thing I have ever witnessed in my life. It didn't hurt that she was dressed in a beautiful red Christmas dress, and looked like a fairy princess, but that's not the point. Point is, after seeing her sign so beautifully, and recalling how many times I've met deaf people and felt inadequate to have a conversation with them (who's really the disabled one, hmmm?), I've been determined to find a way to learn sign language and teach it to the kids.
So back to the other day. One of my readers here sent me an email after she saw my comment about this, and gave me a link to a place called Deaf Missions Lending Library. I read over the entire site in about 3 days, then made my selection from the list of available resources. It wasn't easy to choose, either. Take a look here at their selections.
As far as I can tell, if you don't know sign language, there just isn't any reason for you not to take advantage of this amazing resource. The Lending Library is free (although they do ask for a $5.00 gift, and why not? It's the same cost as renting a video but the proceeds go to further the gospel and minister to the deaf community - way better use of the $$, right??), the list of titles is incredible, and they have resources for beginning learners as well.
Shipping to Canada (or from Canada) can be insane at times - up to 2 weeks for even a letter or small parcel. I ordered my video from these folks and received it in just a little over a week - so that was good. (We just got it a few days ago)
Day before yesterday we watched the first segment of the video and then we had sign-practice. We've decided that each morning before school, we're going to practice the alphabet & all the signs we can remember from the day before. So far, Rachel (7) shows some real talent for picking this up quickly.
I just can't say enough good things about this ministry, and I wanted my readers to know about it.
A HUGE thank you to GrammaMack for steering me in the direction of Deaf Missions. :o)
Just a quick note to let you know the conference/blogger get together link at the top of the page, has been updated. Thanks to Pastor Paul. :o)
You know... people are just strange. Yes, some of you may wonder what took me so long to come to such an obvious conclusion, but there it is all the same.
I was reading about a particular topic of interest to me on an email list I'm on, and it made me think of the other side of the coin, so to speak. The particular topic is the idea of using Matthew 18 to resolve online disputes. I've written about that here, and may just have to revise it a bit, a year later.
The one aspect of that issue that I didn't write about last November, was the increasing attitude I've noticed that goes something like this:
Blogger1 writes a post about about Blogger2's ugly sweater. Blogger2 gets his bloomers in a bunch and demands Blogger1's pastor's name so that church discipline can be brought down on Blogger1. Blogger1 responds and says "um...no" so Blogger2 posts some public slander about Blogger1 so that everyone might know how mean and opinionated Blogger1 really is, when it comes to ugly sweaters.
Does that really sound like Christian conduct to you? Nope, me either.
While I used a silly example of an ugly sweater, these things can be as simple as a doctrinal disagreement, or disagreement over just about anything really.
While Blogger2 is all about freedom to express his opinion of Blogger1, he finds fault with Blogger1 expressing his opinion, and wants him shut down. Someone please correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't this hypocrisy?
It seems to me that we should be free to express our opinions, our disagreements and our opinions of those disagreements, without the idea that someone's going to come along and cry foul, demanding church discipline on someone for something that doesn't even fall into the category of something worthy of church discipline.
You may assume (and you'd be wrong, so don't assume!) I'm referring to a particular incident here, but I assure you I'm not. I've seen this kind of thing increase dramatically over the last year, and it's gotten to the point that I've come to expect this kind of response when folks air their disagreements on these public formats of blogs & forums. I find myself waiting to see that next response that says something about contacting someone's pastor, or "do your elders know you're posting this!?" (when it's something truly trivial, nothing at all worth being "church discipline" concerned).
While I certainly do believe there are particular offenses & conduct that ARE worth notifying pastors (if possible), what I think I'm seeing is a power-trip run amok. As if some very determined folks are using this as a type of leverage to shut people up that disagree with them (but they have no problem being very public with their opinions of the person that disagrees with them).
I guess I just don't understand the psychology behind all this. Maybe it's just plain ole fashioned pride? Maybe. Maybe there's more to it that I'm not seeing, or just not getting.
Maybe it's time to go make oatmeal and get my day started.
Not long ago, after observing a conversation/argument/debate/discussion in an online Christian chat room, someone asked "my goodness, you people claim to love the Lord, yet where is your joy??"
I was present, but not a part of that conversation. Nevertheless, it was a really good question. It may appear on the outside that the joy isn't there - and it may also be true that the joy has slipped or been stuffed away somewhere.
In conversations pertaining to bad doctrine, bad theology, bad ecclesiology, the state of the world, wars, death, destruction and more - it is quite easy to overlook the joy that Christians really do have. It's also quite easy ourselves, to forget the joy we have. This is something we should never ever forget, even for a brief moment.
I'd really like you to take some time today and meditate on these verses. It will only serve to bless you!
• Thou wilt shew me the path of life: in thy presence is fulness of joy; at thy right hand there are pleasures for evermore. (Psalm 16:11)
• Whom having not seen, ye love; in whom, though now ye see him not, yet believing, ye rejoice with joy unspeakable and full of glory (1Peter 1:8)
• These things have I spoken unto you, that my joy might remain in you, and that your joy might be full. (John 15:11)
• For the kingdom of God is not meat and drink; but righteousness, and peace, and joy in the Holy Ghost. (Romans 14:17)
• Yet I will rejoice in the LORD, I will joy in the God of my salvation. (Habakkuk 3:18)
When people meet you for the first time, do they get the impression that you're a joyful person? Do they see gladness in your expressions, conversations, and reactions? Someone once suggested to me that the mood you walk around with is your mood of choice. In other words, you determine your mood and decide you want to be in that particular mood. That was somewhat difficult for me to hear since I'm the kind of person that is easily set off into a bad mood when things fall apart or breakdown and nothing is going smoothly (which tends to happen a lot in a house with this many kids). It's not easy to adjust my mood of choice, so I have to rely on His strength to do it.
I don't want to be that person that only experiences that joy in Christ on Sundays while singing Be Still My Soul in church. I want to be that person that is carried week to week with that joy, that gladness.
How about you?
I have no idea where the time has gone since yesterday. It started out with one of those headaches that could almost classify as a migrane, but not quite, and then it went downhill from there, more or less. The headache lasted until right around noon today. So for school we did Bible, sign-language and handwriting. Those are the best subjects in the world, when you have a hyper-jackhammer operator in your head trying to get out. It was school-lite today, hopefully we'll pick it up tomorrow and make good time.
Soon I'll be posting about the sign-language lessons we're doing, they're SO cool.
I had every intention of not only working on a quilt today, but posting the "before" pictures of it as well. Then my usb cable for my camera decided it doesn't like me anymore. That & the headache combined with just way too much other stuff to take care of, and the quilt was put off yet another day.
I did spend part of last night and today working on my Christmas Shoppe. I'm rather pleased with the way things turned out, so there ya go. Merry Christmas Online Shopping. Yes, I'm thinking of Christmas. My feet have been cold for a week & my hands were so cold today I had to actually run them under hot tap water to warm them up. Winter is right around the corner. I want an electric blanket. I started to type "eclectic". Maybe I want one of those too?
Oh, and I also posted over here looking for someone to make sense of the nutty news item I read yesterday. I also posted here, because it was way too funny to pass up.
I plan to resume the Bible Promises series tomorrow morning. I hope they're a blessing to anyone who's reading them. I'll be adding a page soon with the full listing of posts on Bible Promises, then updating it as I add new sections.
(This post will remain on top for the next several days, beginning today)
"2,996 is a tribute to the victims of 9/11.
On September 11, 2006, 2,996 volunteer bloggers will join together for a tribute to the victims of 9/11.Each person will pay tribute to a single victim.
We will honor them by remembering their lives,and not by remembering their murderers. "
That's what the site says, and when Julie posted the link to it in #pros, I immediately signed up.
When I signed up for this a few weeks ago, the system there automatically assigned for me a victim to honor and remember. In conjuction with 3,310 other bloggers this week, each and every victim of 9/11 will be remembered.
We all remember what we were doing that morning, where we were standing or sitting, what was said, and the immediate shock and unbelief that washed over us. We all remember the the tears that began to flow, and we all remember feeling so helpless. This week, let's just take some time and remember the people who were there:
His name was John.
John T. Vigiano, age 36, to be exact. John was a resident of West Islip, N.Y., and was killed at the WTC. John was a member of the NYFD.
Obviously, I didn't know John. Many did though, and I wanted to make sure you got to know him a little better too. Sadly, John wasn't the only family member lost on 9/11 to the Vigiano family. His brother, a Joseph a NYC detective, also lost his life that day.
Editorial Reviews
Amazon.com
Like the Naudet brothers' 9/11, Twin Towers began as a documentary about New York City's public safety workers and became a relevant record of the September 11, 2001 terrorist attacks. Law and Order producer Dick Wolf was looking for a new reality show and found a perfect, exciting group to film: NYPD Emergency Services Squad 3. This elite force is on call for a variety of extreme situations--armed sieges, rescues on ice, climbing massive bridges to help potential jumpers--making it a natural for Wolf's type of TV show. The program never aired, but the footage shot is the backbone for this Oscar-winning documentary short. The squad--who always wants to be first to the scene--took a heavy blow when the twin towers collapsed: 14 men died, including Joseph Vigiano, a talented officer who had roots in public service (his dad and brother were firefighters). In a brief 33 minutes, we hear from father John Sr. and the men of squad C about the brothers, the job, and that fateful September day. The film doesn't have the verisimilitude of 9/11 nor is it a dynamic film; it feels more like an excellently produced segment of a TV news magazine. Yet this tribute is unquestionably moving, effective, and a testament to everyday heroes. --Doug Thomas
No, we will never forget.
I suspect that like myself, there are many others this morning who just watched part 1 of the ABC special "The Path to 9/11". I also suspect, that there will be all sorts of opinions aired on the accuracy of this television event.
As we all know with vividly painful memories, the actual events of 9/11 were not a television movie. Many of us watched them happen live, and it is doubtful that we will ever forget what we saw.
That morning, the older girls had gone to school, and Kev was off work for the day. He was helping Jordan and Rachel wash up after breakfast, Jessica was getting ready for homeschool, and I was just finishing up with feeding Samuel his breakfast. That's when the phone rang. It was Kev's sister calling from work. At first he couldn't understand her, but then after a few seconds realized she was saying "turn on your tv to the news, now!". She had been listening to the radio at work, when the report of the attack on the WTC was first reported. I don't know which Canadian radio station she was listening to but they immediately said the word "terrorists" and that was the word Kev's sister repeated to him over the phone.
He hung up the phone and looked at me with that look that people have when they are about to break the news to you that someone important to you, has just died. Yes, there is a look, and yes, he had it all over his face. On his way to the living room to turn on CNN, he said to me "that was Kim, she heard on the radio that terrorists have just flown a plane into one of the World Trade Center towers in New York". He might as well have said "reports are coming in that Sasquatch is giving birth to triplets on Main Street". It was the most surreal thing I have ever heard anyone say.
Seconds after we turned on the tv, and began attempting to process what we were seeing and hearing, we watched live as the second plane hit the second tower. Instantly my thoughts turned to the people in that building. I knew what they were doing. They were looking over paperwork & having a coffee or a tea. Some were on the phone, some were looking over their appointments for the day. They were doing what anyone in an office building does at that time of the morning. To them, it was just another ordinary day. The sun was shining and it was quite a beautiful morning.
In a split second that beautiful morning turned into a nightmare of unprecedent porportions that millions of people around the world, stood frozen (except for the tears streaming down their faces) in front of their tv screens and watched. It's been said that we all became New Yorkers that day, and I believe in many ways, that's true. While many of us didn't personally know anyone at ground zero, the Pentagon or on flight 93 that morning - we did know them in that they were our fellow man. They were regular folks just like me, folks who hated broccoli, folks who had teenagers that were giving them grief, folks who had unruly curly hair, needed some new shoes, and had a family birthday coming up to prepare for. They were my fellow Americans, and for Kev they were his fellow North Americans. In so many ways, they were just our people, and we all become somewhat territorial that day, as our hearts broke over and over again for the innocent lives that were brutally ended.
As Kev and I stood and watched the tv, I don't remember if we said much at all to each other. I do recall at one point wondering outloud about how many people were in those buildings. Hoping many of them were late for work that day, or were on vacation. While we watched, the kids were playing in the living room behind us, completely unaware of what was happening just over the border in New York - and unfolding on the screen in our living room. They were too little to realize the significance of it.
As the first tower began to collapse, my own physical strength left me and I went to my knees in tears, and began to pray for God's mercy on those still left inside. The tears wouldn't stop, and I was as helpless as everyone else who watched the same thing. Five years later it's still hard to recall the events of that morning from a bystanders perspective.
As I kneeled on my living room floor, crying and praying, two little girls who were not yet 2 and not yet 4, came up beside me on either side, and put their arms around me and they both asked why I was crying. In the best way I could think of I tried to explain to them that the people in that building had just died. They both watched the tv screen for a few seconds, then just held me tighter. I didn't want them upset, but the reality of that morning was something that was impossible to shield from them.
I don't know how long we had the tv on that day, but I do remember it being hard to concentrate on even the smallest things. I'm not even sure we turned the tv off for the next several days.
That Friday, president Bush had declared that it would be a day to fly the American flag. Knowing this in advance, Kev and I went to the hardware store to buy one. They were sold out. Then we went to another hardware store, and another, and another, and another - everyone was sold out. Finally we found one little mom & pop store way across town that had two or three left, and we came home and raised our flag on the pole in the backyard Thursday night. When I woke up Friday morning, it was a beautiful day, so I took my coffee and went out in the back yard for a few minutes. Something caught my eye in the neighbor's yard to my left, and when I turned and looked to see what it was, it was an American flag, flapping in the light breeze. Then I looked across the street, and there were more. I turned to my right and looked down that direction, and as far as I could see there were American flags proudly flying from Canadian homes. The support from the Canadian just in my own neighborhood overwhelmed me, and I stood in my yard and cried.
Later that day Kev and I had to run some errands, and what we were about to see in town was something I have never seen before, or since. Absolutely every single business we drove past, had American flags flying. Some businesses had more than one, and one car dealership had an American flag flying from every pole on the car lot. There must have been 50 of them all in one spot. Block after block, all you could see were the stars and stripes of American patriotism. Being an American in Canada at such a time, seeing so much compassion and support from our neighbors to the north, simply made me so proud of the Canadian people. Politics & government positions aside, my fellow Canadians understood what was important, and their true colors came out. One newspaper article I read the following week commented that by flying the American flag, the true colors of Canadians showed on their flagpoles - in that in a time of crisis such as 9/11, the only thing that really mattered were people who cared to show support and offer compassion for the innocent victims.
I could go on and on about my memory of this day, and the days that followed. The political, doctrinal, philosophical, ecumenical and utterly ridiculous conversations that followed, and continue to this day. I'll leave those conversations out of this, as I'm sure you can find them in abundance today, on the 5th anniversary of 9/11.
I will however close with this, and have held on tight to these truths since the morning of 9/11:
• Daniel answered and said, Blessed be the name of God for ever and ever: for wisdom and might are his: And he changeth the times and the seasons: he removeth kings, and setteth up kings: he giveth wisdom unto the wise, and knowledge to them that know understanding (Daniel 2:20,21)
• Remember the former things of old: for I am God, and there is none else; I am God, and there is none like me, Declaring the end from the beginning, and from ancient times the things that are not yet done, saying, My counsel shall stand, and I will do all my pleasure (Isaiah 46:9,10)
• And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose. (Romans 8:28)
Many things happen in this life that leave us without the one answer that we struggle with the most:
WHY?
We cannot always know that answer, or understand it even if we do know it. We can however be assured that God is in control, has always been and will always be in control, and will work all things for good, even those evil things, that evil & wicked men do. Joseph assured his brothers that what they had done, that was intended for evil - God had used for good (Gen. 50:20).
How much more evil was it that by wicked hands Jesus our Lord, God in the flesh, the Creator of all, was delivered up and crucified - but at the same time, this was done with the determinate counsel and foreknowledge of God, for our good? We do grieve at the Biblical account of what was done to Jesus at the hands of wicked men, but we know it was ordained to come to pass, prophecied in the OT, foretold since Genesis, that it would happen - and that it would happen as payment for sin, for our redemption.
It can be very difficult to wrap our minds around such brutal acts of terror, whether they be against an nation, or just one person. Our comfort and our assurance as believers, is that God in His sovereignty and majesty is in fact in complete control of every situation.
Today is a painful and difficult day for many people. Take some time to remember them in prayer.
I realized this evening that I haven't had time all day to write about any of the things I've been wanting to address. My mind is like the Toys R Us on Christmas eve - there are all sorts of thoughts and ideas of various shapes & sizes, literally scattered all over the place in there. Clean up in aisle blog, is one way to get them all neatly stacked back on the shelves so one doesn't hurt themselves on the way through.
Today, we had a barge load of fun with our visit with Kim and Neil and their kids. Kev bbq'd, Kim brought a big crockpot of yummy baked beans (that Jessica would have taken to her room with a giant spoon, if we would have let her), and I made pie. The kids had fun playing as always, and Jessica finally got to meet Virginia (all the times we've visited before, Virginia hadn't been able to come). Most of the afternoon Jessica and Virginia sat in Jessica's room singing together.
We did play badminton (the weather man was off, not a drop of rain today, but the wind did present a bit of a challenge!) and it was the boys against the girls. Let me be clear on 1 thing right here: the boys cheat. They beat us 2 for 2. Bah... there WILL be a rematch, but likey not until next spring, at the earliest.
It was just a REALLY good day today. No pictures though, we were having too much fun to stop and grab a camera. Besides, I was having a bad hair day and no one wants to see that anyway.
To cap off the day, my dear friend Steve has reposted one of the best things I've ever read on the issue of forgiveness, and how vital it is in our Christian life. If this is an area you (or someone you know) struggles with, you really need to read this. It will bless your heart and change your attitude about extending forgivness, and eliminating the potential for bitterness to take root in your life. Please, please - go read the above link.
Last evening I was reading through the comments at Kim's blog post where she wonders if she's still a homeschool mom, or a traitor. Knowing Kim, I suspect wrote that only partially tongue in cheek.
In response to Libbie (everyone's favorite English Muffin) Kim wrote:
"Sadly enough, some of the responses I have received when I've "confessed" to being a part-time ps mom, you'd think I was being interrogated by the HS Police."
To which Spunky replied:
"This isn't a personal issue. I do hope people realize this isn't about being the part of some "club" called homeschooling. "
Spunky had much more to say than this, but this is the part that I got hung up on. Hopefully (and it would seem that is the case based on Spunky's comments), she has never experienced what it's like to be unceremoniously dumped outside the camp of Club Homeschool. Fact is, while it's not suppose to be a "club" (and to me it's not), to many it is exactly that, and if you don't fit into the standard mold of HS'er in the eyes of said club members, you will never fit in.
Now I know that sounds harsh, but for many of us HS moms, it's as accurate as it gets (minus a few pretty upsetting stories that should have never happened).
What I mean when I say "fit into the standard mold" is pretty basic. In many HS circles you're simply expected to approvingly nod every suggestion, every recommendation, and every new how-to book or tool that comes along. If you don't, then shame on you.
In such circles you're expected to join the local HS support groups. While this is a good idea if a solid group is available - Christians joining HS groups that are "inclusive" or called Christian but totally ecumenical in nature will leave many believers feeling rather out of place. You don't dare say anything and upset the apple cart, either. If you do, you're the outcast, the rebel, the troublemaker.
I've had some of these experiences, and so have many others who homeschool. It's real, these cliques certainly do exist, and it can be rather discouraging to the new HS'ing family. These are the elitist HS'ers, the hyper-homeschoolers, and the ones that make you feel about as inadequate and useful as a wet tube sock. To these folks, HS'ing is a club, and you either hush up and agree with everything, or you're not welcome.
Oh - and don't EVER show compassion for, defend, or discuss public school (ps) parents, teachers, or school districts in a positive way. And if you have kids in PS, and HS at the same time, well you can forget about ever fitting in, even if you wanted to.
In Spunky's comment she said "this isn't a personal issue". It shouldn't be, but it's certainly made personal when you're grilled left, right and center by other HS'ers whenever you make a statement that doesn't fall in line with their idea of "proper" homeschooling. And don't even get me started on the heated debates that I've watched/been involved in, re: classical, unschooling, and various other methods of educating your children.
After having said all that - I want to make sure folks do understand that this is a relatively small cliquish type behavior within the HS community. Small, but you better believe it, HS Snobbery certainly does exist (online and offline both) - just as rabid, anti-HS folks exist among the PS community.
It's unfortunate, but it's just the way it is.
Spunky made an additional comment at Kim's that's really good advice:
"The best thing to do when you encounter those types of people is just to dust the dirt off your feet and move on."
And to that I say AMEN. I would also add, that you allow it to be a lesson in how not to treat people that exercise alternative educational choices for their kids. After all, if anyone should understand & appreciate the freedoms that HS'ing affords us to persue multiple options in education, it's other HS parents.
Just a few thoughts on a topic that has bothered me for a very long time.
*shrugs*
There is just not enough time in a morning to do all those things I want to do. I even got up before the sun did, and I'm still short on time for this morning. So, instead of actually doing my to-do list, I'm going to post it and maybe one of you will remind me to get on it?
• Post a follow up to this topic at Kim's, and in particular the comment I left last night. (grumble, snarl, snort)
• Post the next installment of Bible Promises
• Clean my house for company tomorrow (we always enjoy visiting with Kim and Buggy - even if the forecast for tomorrow is rain & t-storms which postpones the next badminton match)
• Tell you about the quilt project I'm about to begin, thanks to my gma who turns 88 tomorrow (Happy Birthday Grandma!)
• Re-direct traffic over to Frank's blog (oh, I just did that)
• Write a 40 mile long blog post on what it really means to be known for what you're for, rather than for what you're against (this one's been stewing for months)
• Write another public declaration about hating shopping - something I have to do today.
• Share several "fall comfort foods" recipes I have, now that the weather is turning and summer is slipping away (sniff, sniff)
• Make a crumble top raspberry pie for our guests tomorrow (and shoo Kev away from it until it's time to slice it)
And finally, tell you about this, which I'll just do now. Our 2007 wall calendar features rich color photographs of light & nature, coupled with corresponding Proverbs to match each month. These are perfect for Christmas gift giving, and are a wonderful way to keep the Word before you all year long. I so look forward to creating the new calendar each fall.
Several years ago, a lady bought several of these calendars for Christmas gifts, for the folks she works with. A couple of them put their calendars up in their office cubicles. One of the ladies that received a calendar (an unbeliever) was particularly intrigued by the verses on the month's pages, and began to ask questions about the Bible, Christianity, and how these things pertain to her. She didn't have a Bible, so the lady who bought her the calendar, saw to it that she received a Bible as well. They had many long talks about the Scriptures, and the last I heard, she was still asking questions and still reading her Bible.
If I never sold another calendar in my life, that was enough to really encourage me & bless me.
In any event, this years calendar is a trip through Proverbs (chapters 1 through 12). Here are the product specs:
Keeping track of important dates on your calendar is easy when you can view 12 months of inspiring images that reflect your personal interests. Our high-quality calendar is printed on thick 100lb cover weight paper and adds impact to any room.
• Each page Measures 8.5” x 11”, Measures 11” x 17” when hung on wall
• Full bleed dynamic color
• 100 lb cover weight high gloss paper, wire-o bound
• January 2007 – December 2007, 2008 preview, US holidays marked
Click here and you can view the individual calendar pages. And don't forget - if you use the coupon code located at the top of each page - our $21.99(US) calendar is yours for $16.99 plus shipping.
And now, I have to go get ready to go shopping. UGH. Why can't all shopping be done online???
Have a great Friday!
Yesterday someone asked me "so Carla, will you be writing much at the new Pulpit Magazine blog?"
was more or less my reaction, which was immediately followed by a tongue-in-cheek "I don't recall receiving an invite to be a contributor". I think the person was joking, but I'm not sure. So I went over there to read later, and noticed they've added a blogroll. I don't know who's in charge of that but whoever it was, was kind enough to include not only this blog, but ENo as well. They did so after this brief intro-disclaimer:
"This is the beginning of what we hope will be an extensive blogroll of conservative-evangelical, reformed blogs. Please understand that it is currently a work in progress. Also, the listing of a blog here does not necessarily indicate our full endorsement of or agreement with everything posted on that blog."
I think they put that last sentence in there after they listed me.
In other blogging news...
Frank's blog will be the testing ground for sidekicks run amok next week, while he's off to regions unknown to "cause terrible woe for Innkeepers and commoditizers of religion". We have no idea where he's going, and we're not even sure Frank knows either. But he's going, you can be sure of that. So I will be contributing there (Lord willing), but I have no idea what I could possibly say there that wouldn't be considered in a large part, of what ran Frank's fine blog right into the ground in record time. He did give me the rules of posting but they're top secret and would cause homeschooling moms to burst into flames, so I can't tell you what they are. But I do like the purple boots.
In yet more blogging news...
Do you want to be an encouragement? Of course you do. Take a look at the comments here and leave a word of exhortation to Mr. Frank Vance. As a Christian blogger, put yourself in his shoes, then ask yourself "how would I hope other Christians responded to this?" Please do take this opportunity to do something edifying in your blogging today. You'll be glad you did.
And now... it's time for oatmeal for the masses.
Have a great Thursday!
Sometimes, the way of God's timing of events is nothing short of astounding. I found it remarkable that I had been looking forward to seeing what Phil had to say regarding the pressure he's been under to dogpile on Slice - and then reading immediately afterward (elsewhere), the breaking news of Ligonier Ministries actually filing a lawsuit against a blogger.
How the two are connected should be pretty obvious, but in a nutshell, they are connected simply because of the nature of blogging and the nature of freedom of expression. Maybe even more importantly, they are connected in the aspect that we (as Christian bloggers) have an obligation to be responsible, accountable, and stand for the truth with grace. Something else I'm now looking forward to Phil addressing, when he returns from his vacation.
This is important stuff, and important to me personally for a couple of reasons. One, because of the nature of what I do at ENo, and two, because I've actually come pretty close to this issue myself. Before I go any further let me just say this about Mr. Vance & Ligonier Ministries:
While there are always two sides to every story, after reading much about this case it appears that two things are obvious. 1. If the Biblical method for resolving such things was employed first (confronting your brother privately), it certainly didn't work. And 2., believers taking a lawsuit to a court of unbelievers is just unBiblical. Period. For the record, I didn't say that, the Bible says it.
Now, back to my rambling thoughts on this issue overall.
What I do and what Denise does at ENo, is exactly the same thing our sister Ingrid and her co-contributors do at Slice. I completely understand their passion, their motivation, and their sense of urgency in providing information to warn the body of Christ. There's a lot of destructive, awful junk out there to be warned about. However, it seems from all I read that it's their tone that is questioned over and above the actual message they put out. In other words "you're SO mean! I'm not listening to you!!". I have a houseful of little kids who often speak to each other in less than gracious ways, so I hear this kind of defensive response toward one another quite frequently. This is a classic reaction based on feelings, rather than logic. This should be a red flag for believers who supposed to be adults.
A commenter here today mentioned that he hadn't seen much action at ENo lately. There's a really good reason for that, and in my case the reason is pretty simple. Conviction. This is also how all these recent events are connected, and how it pertains to me, personally.
I recently posted at ENo that I had been convicted of tone at times (my own), and wanted to let the readers there know that harsh or sarcastic tone is certainly not the message I want to relay. At the same time, I strongly believe that speaking out and speaking up when something is wrong, is certainly a Biblical obligation we all have, among the household of faith. For me it's very simple:
If your house was on fire and I was walking past & saw it - would you want me to come barging through the door and drag you out - or would you be ticked off that I broke your front door window to get in? Sadly, a lot of people are too busy being ticked off that they have a broken window, to realize that it was done in order to save them and those they love the most, from burning to death.
While I don't pretend that it's my mission or anything to be a spiritual firefighter, I'm just one of those people who can't help but speak out, and speak up. It's not about getting enjoyment for breaking your window - but at the same time I have no business trampling your rose bushes, kicking your dog, and spray painting your car on the way in. In other words, there is what I believe to be an acceptable level of conduct in our speech in warning, then there is overkill. What I have been convicted of over the last several months as it pertains to what I do at ENo, was the overkill.
I said that there were a couple of reasons why the recent events affect me personally. One is ENo, the other is the fact that I have had to deal with some rumors of a lawsuit as well. Certainly nothing on the level of a newsworthy article, but in very much the same capacity as the Ligonier Minsitries litigation.
It's really not worthy of much attention other than to say I publicly documented and challenged what someone wrote on their website - and they didn't like it. Saying they didn't like it is really an understatement, but the allegations that came out as a result of it, were nothing short of bold faced lies and self-preservation tactics. It was ugly. Really ugly.
It did benefit me though, in that I had to check and re-check my motives, my sources, my accuracy and my motives (always a good thing to double & triple check those, since we have a tendency to get fleshly, especially when under criticism). It caused me to pray a lot before I ever posted on that issue, and it caused me to really consider if what I had to say, was worth saying. And if it was worth saying, then it was worth saying accurately.
I think there are a lot of lessons we (Christian bloggers) can take from the recent events, however your own personal mileage may vary. I also think it's a wise move to pray for the people in the spotlight. Pray that God may be glorified, His people be humbled and edified, and that genuine discernment is applied by all parties. Pray also that the name of Christ will not be made a mockery by the conduct of those involved and being watched by unbelievers. Because they're always watching and we all know it.
Just a few thoughts...
You know the old joke about how a man would rather get lost (or stay lost) than to pull over and ask someone for directions? Well the truth is, to some degree we're all like that. Humbling ourselves and admitting we don't know the way, or don't have all the answers, is a blow to the pride and we really like our pride. We like putting out the appearance that we've got it all together and life is just a snap. I think maybe admitting that we don't have it all together, don't always have the answers, or don't know the way, makes us feel like we're inadequate somehow and we just don't want to give out that kind of message.
The truth is, we are inadequate. No matter how smart, how gifted or talented, no matter how well studied or how pious we might be - we are still in need of God's guidance and wisdom throughout each and every day of our lives. Like the man who refuses to admit this and ends up lost on the highway, we will also end up lost and cause for ourselves more grief than we ever dreamed of, if we dare to dig our heels in, in our ignorance.
The Bible promises us God's guidance and we should diligently be seeking this at every turn!
• Shew me thy ways, O LORD; teach me thy paths. Lead me in thy truth, and teach me: for thou art the God of my salvation; on thee do I wait all the day. (Psalm 25:4,5)
• The meek will he guide in judgment: and the meek will he teach his way. (Psalm 25:9)
• I will instruct thee and teach thee in the way which thou shalt go: I will guide thee with mine eye. (Psalm 32:8)
• Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths. (Proverbs 3:5,6)
• For this God is our God for ever and ever: he will be our guide even unto death. (Psalm 48:14)
• If I take the wings of the morning, and dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea; Even there shall thy hand lead me, and thy right hand shall hold me. (Psalm 139:9,10)
One of the best loved hymns of many believers is Guide Me O Thou Great Jehovah.
If it's been a while since you've sung this to Him, now is always a good time:
Guide me, O Thou great Jehovah,
Pilgrim through this barren land.
I am weak, but Thou art mighty;
Hold me with Thy powerful hand.
Bread of Heaven, Bread of Heaven,
Feed me till I want no more;
Feed me till I want no more.
Open now the crystal fountain,
Whence the healing stream doth flow;
Let the fire and cloudy pillar
Lead me all my journey through.
Strong Deliverer, strong Deliverer,
Be Thou still my Strength and Shield;
Be Thou still my Strength and Shield.
When I tread the verge of Jordan,
Bid my anxious fears subside;
Death of deaths, and hell’s destruction,
Land me safe on Canaan’s side.
Songs of praises, songs of praises,
I will ever give to Thee;
I will ever give to Thee.
Amen
Wow. First, go read this. If you don't know any of the details (and I know just a few, but certainly not enough to give any kind of substantial commentary, yet), you might want to take the time to read the background on it.
I must say though, my initial reaction was "I'm so not surprised". Not because of anything to do with Ligonier ministries, but because I was the recipient of lawsuit threats just about a year ago, for very much the same reason this man expresses. To my knowledge, nothing ever came of it, but one never knows the lengths others may go to, to shut you up, if they don't want to address what you've said.
It should be most interesting to see how this plays out.
Seems the best approach for you and me (outsiders looking in) is to pray that the Biblical mode of resolve be reached, rather than bringing in unbelieving judges. Seems to me the Bible is pretty clear about this stuff.
I am interested in your thoughts though. Anyone care to comment on this one?
Last night as I pulled out the stack of school books to sort through for the kids, I was once again impressed that Samuel (who is less than a week into his 6th year on this earth) is working in the same books as his sisters, who are almost 9, and almost 8. Jordan and Rachel are currently working in a combination of second and third grade level books - which is just right for their comprehension level. If Samuel were in public school here in Ontario, he'd only be entering first grade, and if he were in public school in my hometown, he'd only be entering kindergarten.
One of the great things about homeschooling your kids, is that you can start them when they're ready, they can advance when they're ready, and you don't have deadlines or age restrictions to tell you to move them ahead if they're not ready. For homeschoolers, it's about the learning. I think that's the way it's supposed to be.
With Samuel, I never had any reason to suspect that he was going to be such a sharp kid, academically. Let's take a trip back in the Baby Story Time Machine:
When we found out I was pregnant with Samuel, at first it was a bit shocking. When we learned that Rachel was on the way, it was nerve-wracking enough considering that I was essentially going to have 2 babies to take care of, since Jordan was only 16 months old when Rachel was born. All of the older girls were at least three years apart, so I'd never had 2 babies in the house at the same time. Adding to that, the news that Samuel was on the way meant that I'd have three babies under the age of three, all at once. I had about 7 months to prepare myself for that reality, but even with that I really didn't know what was in store for me.
My pregnancy with Samuel was nothing short of extreme, and extremely painful. I didn't have any kind of serious physical problems, other than the fact that he was a large baby, and I carried him very low. For all you moms out there that carried a baby this way, you know exactly what I mean. Sometimes it really did feel like he was going to make his grand entrance at any time, he was so low. For any men still reading at this point, visualize holding a bowling ball inbtween your knees, 24 hours a day 7 days a week for 9 months, with never once letting it fall. Now imagine each month that bowling ball getting a little heavier, and a little heavier. In some ways, it was like that.
When the due date was coming close, I was coming closer all the time to slipping into panic mode that I was going to have a quick labor like I did with Rachel (exactly 90 minutes from first labor pain to "it's a girl!"), and there would be no time for any pain control medication. Jordan was also a natural birth, but not by my choice. Once labor began with her, she also came too quickly for any pain control, but I'll share that Baby Story when it's her turn.
About a week before he arrived, I had one last ultrasound just to make sure all was well. He was alread a week late by the doctor's estimation, so they were just being cautious. The ultrasound tech assured me everything was fine, and by her estimation he was about a 9 pounder, or more. The idea of a 9 pound baby coming into this world without so much as a tylenol for mom, was simply out of the question. At least Jordan and Rachel were both small, but even with them the pain was something that was intense enough to scare me into being the poster child for Epidurals R Us.
The last week before Samuel came, would have us in the hospital at least 5 times with false labor. Kev says it was more, but I recall only those five. It happened the same way each time: labor would start, I'd begin timing, and when they were less than 2 minutes apart for at least 30 minutes, we'd grab the baby bag and head out the door. Every single time it played out the same way:
I'd get to the hospital and they'd hook me up to the baby heart monitor, the gizmo that tracks your contractions, then they'd examine me. Nope, they'd say, you're not ready - he's not ready. Within the hour the contractions would stop, and off we'd go back to the house. By the last time this happened I think I cried all the way home. At this point, I was in so much pain I couldn't hardly walk, or sit, or even lay comfortably. For the last two months it often felt like a hot spear was piercing both hip joints and my tailbone. Nothing helped, so I just prayed a lot.
Finally, the doctor just said "meet me at the hospital on the 2nd, and we'll induce". Choruses of alleluia's could be heard in the background of the telephone conversation. Already a week late, "induce" was music to my ears, literally.
So, in the middle of a most awesome, late summer thunderstorm, we drove to the hospital that morning. I was induced and given the epidural. Things were going really well, until it was time to push. At that moment, the epidural completely wore off and it was suddenly Bad Dream central. I tried to explain this to the nurse, but by this time there was not much they could do. Knowing that I was going to deliver this 9 pound baby and feel it all, really stirred up some frightening panic in me, so I prayed, and prayed hard. I prayed, Kev prayed, and the nurse just kept patting me on the leg assuring me I was doing fine. To be completely honest, a few times she said that I just wanted to slug her. Yeah, I gotchya fine RIGHT HERE lady! It's disturbing the things that go through your head when you're consumed with pain.
During all of this, I could hear the crackling and rumbling of thunder outside. When my eyes were open, I could see the bright flashes of lightening in the room. Kev, being my fellow-weather-geek gave me a running commentary on just how cool the storm was from his view out the window. In between instructions to push, listening to Kev comment on the storm (he was such a trooper, doing his best to give me something to focus on between contractions), sweating, praying, crying and wanting to slug my nurse, I heard one more very loud crack of thunder, just as the nurse said "push" the last time. One more oompha and there he was.
The most beautiful screaming baby boy the world has ever known. He had what looked to me, a great big Charlie Brown head, and he was loud, and he was healthy as a horse, and he was my son. My son. My son Samuel. My little Mr. Baby Guy. I repeated those words in my head at least 100 times as I held him for the first time. After having 5 girls, this whole "son" thing was new to me. When they handed him to me, the clouds outside parted and sunlight filled the room. It was almost as if it were scripted just like in a movie.
I kissed my baby boy's face, told him how much I loved him, and thanked the Lord in prayer that he was healthy, it was over, and all went relatively well, all things considered.
Here we are 6 years and 3 days later, and my goofy son is (as I type, in fact) dressed for school in his tank top and fire engine red shorts, with the flames on them, and making his bed. Over the next two hours this boy will go through his Bible, math, spelling, phonics, history and handwriting workbooks, and then he will say "are we done with school yet?" Then he'll go find his plastic machine gun he got for his birthday, and shoot bad guys in the yard. Apparently the yard is filled with them, since I hear that thing being fired off constantly when he's out there.
And now I am off to make oatmeal for the masses, and then begin our first day of school for the 2006/07 school year.
Have a great Tuesday!
Well, here we are again. The very last night of summer vacation before we crack open the books tomorrow. In some ways, it's hard to believe the summer flew past as quickly as it did. In other ways though, it really was a most productive & enjoyable summer.
This afternoon we had an individual "counselling" session with each of the kids, to go over with them what we expect for the coming year, praise them where they excell, encourage them where they have weak spots, and see if they had any questions about all of that. It was a really good time invested in each kid.
The biggest part of today was spent finishing off household projects that simply must be done, otherwise I cannot concentrate on the teaching task at hand. It may be quirky, but if I know there is laundry to fold & put away, or a floor to mop, or a messy table in the kitchen, I have a really hard time staying focused. I even have to vaccuum the carpet in the school room before we sit down at our tables/desks. Yeah I know, it sounds weird but I guess we all have our funny little things we have to have "just right" in our workspace.
This fall marks the 7th year we've been homeschooling. I had no idea when we started, that 7 years later I would have taught 3 kids to read, have a highschool aged homeschooler, and begin the basic lessons for a pre-kindergartener. I have been so overwhelmingly blessed by wisdom from above, and kids who actually like to learn.
This year is going to be a bit more diverse, and I will just do what I always do: entrust it to the Lord. His timing, His wisdom, His mercy and grace over our entire household - and they that dwell therein.
I hope to get back to the Bible Promises first thing in the morning, as I get my own "school schedule" back on track.
Oh, before I forget - I did have time for one fun thing today. Go here and see it yourself.
:o)
I've never really had a problem confessing that I'm a copycat, or that I'm often creatively inspired by the genius of others. And while a genuinely loyal sidekick-in-training would take every opportunity to toady up to the super-hero in the limelight...
I must say, the newest design in my store actually didn't come about as a result of Frank's Homeboy collection. Although I admit it, had I thought of it first...
Anyhoo...
Cafepress, the fine folks who provide me with the tools for my creative outlet, are about to launch their annual Halloween Hoo Haa, followed immediately by the annual Christmas Hoo Haa. So, here's my contribution to this year's Halloween Blitz:
And they make a great Halloween costume too...
If you're not a regular reader of Dan Phillips (either here or here) you're really missing out. Phil really knew what he was doing when he brought Dan on board at TeamPyro, I'll say that much.
This past week Dan put a challenge of sorts out there, when he blogged on a CT article entitled "Playing for Keeps". In a nutshell, the CT article is about games women play in marriage, to get their way. Dan encouraged us women-folk to take a shot at the premise of this article from our own Biblical view. Your results may vary, and persons named or referred to in the following address are all fictional unless you've actually seen them in person. Batteries not included. :o)
Well...
Let me start out by saying what I've already said at Dan's blog in the comments. I loathe games. Now, give me a round of Trivial Pursuit or Taboo, and I'm happy. Baseball & badminton, just say where and when and I'm there. Those kinds of games are just part of what makes life such a blast. But headgames, or heartgames, those are for people who need to be locked up & fed moldy prunes and wet cardboard until they repent.
When I was a teenager (and unsaved) I had a friend who was a headgame apprentice and thoroughly relished her prowess in the field. She was so good at it, she'd be playing a headgame with someone and tell them she was doing it, and they wouldn't believe her. One time when she did this and I was present, it made me feel sickly and a witness to something gruesome and surreal. Sort of like the time I was in the car when the driver accidentally ran over a puppy. It really hit me right then just how twisted this intentional conduct really is.
In CT's article they list 4 categories of "games" women play in marriage and why each one is wrong. I'll just address the ones they list. While not trying to sound uber-spiritual or anything, I don't have first hand insight into these games so it might not be as easy as it sounds to really address them well. I'll do my best.
#1 The "Mommy/Child" Game
Essentially this is the attitude women take when they treat their husbands like one of the kids. I suppose it's really more of a control issue though, where the woman wants everything done on time, in order, and just the way she wants it. I'll have to confess, I have that kind of a personality and it's not an easy thing to deal with - however - it is not a game, by any stretch of the imagination. It's a battle to control your over-controlling tendencies.
People who know Kev (and maybe Kim and Neil can vouch for this) jokingly refer to him by saying I have 8 kids. I've heard this quite often of men who are fun-loving and goofy. However, this is not even close to being in the same category as the Mommy/Child game. The CT article defines it pretty well by this quote:
"It's unnerving how my wife harps on me like she harps on our kids about doing something around the house. She can't just ask me once and trust I'll do it. She keeps bringing it up until I do it out of exasperation. I feel as though she has no more respect for me than she does for our preschoolers. When she treats me like a child instead of a man, the last thing I want to do is have sex with her. That would feel like having sex with my mother."
I have to be honest here and admit that I don't know a wife that has never done this before. I also know a few husbands who tend to promise to do something, then don't do it, causing a bit of exasperation on the part of the wife. Does that mean it's right to harp on him? No, it means it's part of the way us women are wired, to be the mom & see that things get done. However, it's a HUGE mistake to ever do this with our husbands. It's insulting and degrading, and he doesn't deserve it (even if he does leave his dirty laundry on the floor and it drives us insane). I think the CT article was pretty accurate with this one when the author wrote:
"We'd all do well to remember only children, not grown men, need a mother. Strive to be your man's loving peer, not his parent."
I would add, that if your husband is forgetful or a procrastinator, that you spend some daily time in prayer for him about this. Maybe spend some time praying for yourself too, that you don't get yourself all worked up when he does things in a way that you wouldn't have done them. Stop and consider that maybe he's just as frustrated with your control-freak tendency as you are with his lack of action or forgetfulness. Lighten up on this one, pray for him, pray for yourself, and be a gentle encouragement rather than his mommy. Then smile pick up the laundry and put it in the washer & get over yourself. Remember, the sun doesn't rise and set on you, it never has and never will. There are far too many other VERY important things in life to be concerned about, and this truly is not one of them. Be a mother to your children, and be the helpmeet to your husband, the way it's supposed to be.
#2 The "Spoiled Child/Sugar Daddy" Game
This one really annoys me. The way the CT article defined this one:
"I couldn't help but feel sorry for one woman's husband when she told me, "I can get anything I want from Dan, within reason, of course. All I have to do is cross my legs and stop cooking, and he'll cave in after a couple of days." Translation: I'll withhold sex and starve him until he caters to my every whim."
I'm not so sure I'd feel sorry for the husband. If he's letting his wife get away with this (and I can't imagine a man being so thick-headed he doesn't know he's being manipulated like this?), then he's stepped aside from his Biblical leadership role in the relationship and letting her take over. Shame on him, and shame on her. Shame on them both.
The CT article further suggests:
"Maybe you've played the spoiled-child role in more subtle ways than the woman above. Do any of these words sound familiar? "You didn't mind wining and dining me when we were dating, so why won't you splurge on me now?" or "I'd much rather stay in a nice hotel on the beach than with your relatives. Aren't I worth it to you?"
In a way, I can actually understand the premise behind these kinds of statements, and I'm not entirely convinced that they should automatically fall into this category. It's common knowledge that a lot of men and women, after married, no longer spend the time or the attention on their spouse that they did before they were married. Stand up comics have made small fortunes joking about how both men & women let themselves go & spend more time with the tv (or other interests) than with each other, after being married a while. While it's funny the way it's presented by a comedian, it's really not all that funny to a husband or wife who's being neglected. I think this is where those kind of statements (above) are coming from.
While I agree it's wrong to demand attention, or gifts, or the expensive option (or be such a self-centered slob that you'd go as far as the first quote above and be that manipulative), I think it's really important to not fall into the routine of ignoring your spouse. It hurts, and it's what sends men and women both, looking for that same attention they used to get, in other places. Always a recipe for disaster. I think the more important message to convey here is to never let it go so far in your marriage that your spouse (husband OR wife) would feel like they need to employ this kind of tactic to get your attention.
#3 The "Holy Spirit/Wretched Sinner" Game
CT defines this one as the believing wife/unbelieving husband scenario - and the game employed here would be the self-righteous indignation she might have when he doesn't live up to her expectations, in an effort to have him do/say/think what she wants.
I have been blessed to have a believing husband from before we were ever married, so I honestly don't know what it's like, first hand, to live in a home with an unbelieving spouse. I have had the opportunity over the years to speak with many believers though, who are in this situation, or once were, and based on the way they speak of it, it's painfully difficult at times.
With that said however, I don't think this category is really limited to the believer/unbeliever spouse. The root of this "game" is the root of every kind of sinful conduct, and that's pride. If you think you're exempt from this, that's the first sign that you've been sucked into it. Be on guard, big time.
I had a telephone conversation last week with a good friend and we discussed this very issue - that even in the best of situations with the best of motives, there is still that potential for pride to rear it's ugly head and cause us to conduct ourselves in such a way that we'll later be compelled to repent of. It's easy to sit in judgement of someone else and have that superior air about us when they've dropped the ball - if we forget that we're just as capable of dropping the same ball.
Living a life that glorifies the Lord requires genuine humility, not arrogant finger pointing. While it's certainly Biblical to call out those things that are wrong - it's also Biblical to do it with grace, with compassion, with gentleness and humility, and TONS of prayer (before, during and after dealing with the situation). Any time any Christian would attempt to pull the "Holy Spirit/Wretched Sinner" game, in any situation, they would be in the wrong.
As much as I honestly dislike CT, the author of this particular article was spot on here:
"As much as you may desire your husband to become more committed to spiritual things, remember there's only one God—and you're not him. Deep, heart-felt change is possible only through the real Holy Spirit, not the one you try to be for your husband. Simply pray for your husband, lovingly encourage him when appropriate, and let the Holy Spirit do what only he can do in your husband's life."
#4 The "Patient/Therapist" Game
CT defines this in such a way as when the wife (who is burdened with unresolved emotional/psychological issues) attempts or expects her husband to "fix" her problems.
I'm unsettled on this one, for a few reasons.
I don't think it's fair or charitable at all to classify this as a game. Listen, a lot of us have scars from life that are pretty rough to deal with. Those reading with such scars, know exactly what I'm talking about. Some of us have been the recipients of much grace and mercy in working through these things, while others still struggle along. I can't even begin to explain God's timing on these things, so I wont try.
When a man and woman get married, each brings with them their whole life lived, up to that point. That life lived up to that point makes them who they are - how they carry themselves, the way they dress, speak, think, laugh, cry, etc. Hopefully, and in the ideal situations, the two are honest and upfront with one another about who they are, where they are, and what they are, before the wedding ever takes place. There is much to be said for a long courtship and really, really getting to know one another as friends, before the wedding ever occurs.
If this is the case, then dealing with past issues for either spouse is so much easier, since they're known issues and matters of prayer for both of you, on a regular basis.
If this is not the case, and these are things that come up later, then the ideal situation is that you do pray about them together, and agree together what the best course of address might be to resolve the past issues. But you do it together, and that's key.
Folks may disagree with me on this, but I do strongly believe that a woman should be able to go to her husband with any burden she has on her heart. Now there something to be said for discretion here, in that it is not critical she reveal every single detail of the burden (and that should be something she deals with in her private prayers) to him, but she should be able to express to him that the burden is there. She should be able to go to him and expect good counsel, compassion, encouragement and prayer. While she shouldn't necesarrily expect him to be able to "fix" things, she should take his advice and follow through with that, if that advice is to seek professional Christ-centered counsel outside of his scope of wisdom.
Of course this is based on the husband being wise enough to really listen, pray about the situation and also seek wise counsel himself, if he's unsure about how to direct his wife. As her provider and head, he should take this role very seriously and strive to be that kind of a husband to her.
Now I didn't use any Scripture to address any of these points - just my opinion based on how I understand the Scriptures on these issues. My opinion on these things comes primarily from Ephesians 5:22-31.
I don't consider myself an expert on this topic, by any stretch of the imagination. Kev and I still drop the ball from time to time, and we still have battles with the old pride monster. We still have slobbish self-centered moments too. I only admit that to say that ongoing maturity in Christ is something to really look forward to. We're both a lot more mature than we were when we married (thankfully) and we look forward to maybe someday being that old pruney couple that seem to have it all together, in our relationship. Maybe by then he'll figure out a more catchy name for his blog?
Why look, it's Saturday, the day no one reads this blog. [snark]
For you regular readers, you know that with each of my kids birthdays, I routinely post a modified version of A Baby Story. I very much enjoy stepping back in time and reflecting on the day they were born, and what was happening in my life at the time.
Well, today is my only son's 6th birthday, but his Baby Story is going to have to wait until later.
At the risk of sounding like a whiner, I'm just going to ask for your prayers.
Some of you know that this past Wednesday I had oral surgery. Well, I'm not healing up the way I'd like, and there's a considerable amount of pain I'm dealing with as a result of that. I've never been hit in the jaw with a 2x4 but if I had, I assume it would feel sort of like this.
Then last night, I had one of my stomache episodes that lasted about 4+ hours. While it was a most incredible opportunity for lots of prayer time, it's left me extremely exhausted. Sort of like a cartoon character that gets run over by a large vehicle & flattened to the pavement. But then gets up and walks away.
Add to this, I have to brave the grocery store today & prepare for company for Samuel's birthday. Plus, the front end of Ernesto is due to arrive this morning with heavy rains and blustery winds, which will #1 force everyone inside and #2 flood the basement.
So, if you would remember me in prayer today, I'd sure appreciate that. I don't like to whine, and I've just got too much to do today to make time for pain. Besides, it's Samuel's birthday, and he deserves all the attention for a special day.
UPDATED BELOW
Would you like to truly be a blessing to someone who could really benefit from it right now?
James White of Alpha and Omega Ministries, was robbed last night. Thieves made off with some very important equipment. You can read more about this at James' blog right here.
Both James and brother Rich Pierce could use our prayers right now for their safety, and to put some feet to our faith, why not go over here and make a donation to this ministry (that has blessed SO many of us) to help these brothers out?
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From James White's site:
"We've got the stolen property covered (bless you all); Conan could not get through my door (then again, neither can I--but that is temporary); the monsoon knocked out our alarm system and scrambled its brains, hence the failure---that is fixed, and even improved; bars for the windows are coming next week (thanks, BD!). So, for those asking about what to pray for, a renewed focus on finishing this writing project, and protection from evil men."
It was quite encouraging to read that folks really did step up to the plate and come to the aid of a brother in need. I love it when this happens.
Well, it's not a Homeboy shirt like Frank's, but here's my newest T all the same.
Shown here on the Grown Up Princess T, and also available for the littler princesses in your world, in Jr. Miss Princess.
Surely there is a princess in your life that needs one of these?
I've written quite a bit over the years about Sola Scriptura and why it should be the heart cry of every believer. It seems to me it only serves to hinder the professing Christian that doesn't truly hold to it. Without believing and knowing that God's very word is the final authority in all matters of faith and practice, what you're left with is the wisdom of men. As my friend and brother Campi is fond of saying "the best of men, are men at best". All the combined wisdom of all the most enlightened men and women, cannot compare to the richness and authority of God's very word to His people:
• Thy word is a lamp unto my feet, and a light unto my path. (Psalm 119:105)
• And now, brethren, I commend you to God, and to the word of his grace, which is able to build you up, and to give you an inheritance among all them which are sanctified. (Acts 20:32)
• It is written, Man shall not live by bread alone, but by every word that proceedeth out of the mouth of God. (Matthew 4:4)
• So shall my word be that goeth forth out of my mouth: it shall not return unto me void, but it shall accomplish that which I please, and it shall prosper in the thing whereto I sent it. (Isaiah 55:11)
• Being born again, not of corruptible seed, but of incorruptible, by the word of God, which liveth and abideth for ever. For all flesh is as grass, and all the glory of man as the flower of grass. The grass withereth, and the flower thereof falleth away: But the word of the Lord endureth for ever. And this is the word which by the gospel is preached unto you. (1Peter 1:23-25)
• For ever, O LORD, thy word is settled in heaven. (Psalm 119:89)
There is nothing more comforting than to open your Bible and know that His wisdom, comfort, guidance, assurance, mercy and grace will be revealed to you and equip you for whatever it is you're dealing with today.
